It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environments, such as the South Pole. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#scientists #tourists #travel #environments #pole #development

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this

day and age, researchers and visitors are now able to travel to distant isolated

areas

thanks to the rapid development of technology.

While

this

trend can bring several benefits, I would argue that it has significantly greater drawbacks. On the one hand, there are several upsides of going to remote natural

areas

Firstly

this

is a newer and more interesting type of travel.

In particular

, going to cities or other places has been common for most

people

For example

, having a journey to the Amazon Forest or the South Pole is an extremely attractive choice, which could bring great experiences and unforgettable memories.

Secondly

, when individuals visit remote

areas

, they might acquire knowledge about natural habitats. A good case for

this

is that if travelling to the North Pole, scientists could possibly have a deep understanding of the life of Polar Bears that live far away from humans.

On the other hand

, I contend that the downsides of

this

phenomenon are much greater.

First,

going to isolated

areas

will be quite challenging for

people

who do not have enough experience.

For instance

, the temperature at the South Pole is always very low, which could adversely affect

people

's health, if they do not bring enough necessary clothes.

In addition

, going to places that are isolated from the world will cost a huge amount of money, which could solely suit

people

who are scientists or the wealthy. In conclusion,

although

there are some positive aspects of travelling to distant isolated

areas

, I believe that the demerits of

this

trend overshadow its merits.

Submitted by huynhthienlam1805 on Thu Nov 02 2023

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task response

You have addressed the task and presented arguments for both the advantages and disadvantages of traveling to remote natural environments. However, you need to provide a clear opinion in your introduction and conclusion.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear logical structure with distinct paragraphs for each main point. However, you could improve coherence by using more linking words and phrases to connect your ideas.

lexical resource

Your use of vocabulary is satisfactory, but you could enhance it by incorporating more varied and precise vocabulary.

grammatical range

Your grammatical range and accuracy are generally sound, but there are some instances of errors and awkward phrases. Review your essay carefully to correct these mistakes.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environments, such as the South Pole. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Include an introduction and conclusion

In some countries, it can be difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience. What do you think are the causes and effects of this problem?

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many countries nowadays, a large number of people are moving to cities. Why do people move to cities? Is this a positive or negative trend?

Due to advances in science and technology, the lifestyle of people everywhere in the world has become similar. Is this a positive or a negative development ? "