Many governments have laws that ban the sale and use of hard drugs such as heroin and cocaine, yet they allow people to buy drugs such as tobacco and alcohol. Laws that prohibit the sale and use of hard drugs should be applied to all drugs, including tobacco and alcohol. What is your opinion?
Governments all over the world have different laws regarding the
use
and sale
of narcotic drugs. However
, the sale
of alcohol
and tobacco
products
is not interfered with. Although
these products
pose severe health-related risks, I believe that they should remain legal for consumer purchase and use
.
It is true that the consumption of alcohol
and use
of tobacco
products
can be detrimental to one’s health. This
is because these items can be extremely addictive and are socially well-accepted. This
may lead to excessive drinking which may result in the development of various health conditions such
as liver cirrhosis, and even cancer. It is important to note that the leading cause of lung cancer is the use
of tobacco
products
. Additionally
, smoking cigarettes also
exposes other unwilling individuals to the risks of second-hand smoke. Moreover
, these products
have the ability to alter the mechanism of the brain, resulting in the
increased incidence of mental disorders. For these reasons, it is clearly evident that these legal drugs can have a negative effect on the Correct article usage
an
wellbeing
of an individual.
Despite these concerns, a sudden ban on these goods can have a dramatic effect on the economy and stability of the nation. Correct your spelling
well-being
Tobacco
and alcohol
are widely popular drugs, and hence
, they have a large number of consumers. The companies which manufacture these products
pay large amounts of tax to the government to continue to produce these items. Thus
, a sudden ban on these products
will cause financial instability due to
the sharp decline in the number of customers. It can not be denied these are highly addictive products
and people will go to great lengths to satisfy their addiction. This
can be done through various illegal markets which will result in an increase in crime rates. This
may lead to affect the stability of the nation.
In conclusion, even though alcohol
and tobacco
products
can cause various illnesses, prohibition of the sale
of these products
may not be advantageous to the public and the government. As it may lead to financial and social instability. Thus
, in my opinion, the sale
of these products
should continue.Submitted by Writing8
on
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task achievement
To improve task achievement, try to provide more specific examples to support your arguments. For instance, you could mention specific economic data or historical instances when similar laws impacted the economy or public behavior.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are clear and well-supported, but make sure each paragraph remains highly focused on a single idea. Avoid introducing too many ideas in one paragraph to maintain coherence.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, ensure that each sentence smoothly follows from the one before it. Occasionally, your sentences feel slightly disjointed. Transitional phrases can help maintain the flow of your argument.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly states your opinion and sets up the argument effectively.
logical structure
You have clearly organized the essay into logical paragraphs with distinct main points that are easy to follow.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates your position, providing a strong closing to the essay.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example