66.The government should spend money in promoting sports and art in school, rather than sponsoring professional sports and art events in communities. To what extent do you agree?
It is argued that the government should use their
money
to encourage students at school
to participate in sports and arts activities
instead
of wasting their money
on professional sports and art for the citizens. This
essay completely agrees with this
statement because there are people with hidden talents and extracurricular activities
will better children
's attitudes.
Not all family have enough money
to allow their children
to take other courses apart from the mandatory ones. This
is because an extra fee needs to be paid for after-school
activities
, and there are families that have used all their money
for essential needs and school
classes and do not have extra funds. This
will cause some children
even if they really like an activity, they cannot carry it out, and as a consequence
, talent will be hidden. Recent research concluded that around 80% of students can't show their talent in areas that they are interested in.
Children
should try and look for activities
that they are interested in. This
is because students at school
are full of homework and exams and this
will cause them to be stressed, then
extracurricular activities
, will allow children
to do what they like and at the same time make new friends. In this
way, stress and bad emotions will not show off, and in the long term, children
will be more open-minded. For example
, scientists in Spain said that children
who carry out after-school
activities
seem to have better behaviour and are more frequently enjoying their everyday life
.
In conclusion, talented people should be trained since they are little and Fix the agreement mistake
lives
children
need to undertake activities
that they like, I, therefore
, believe that the government should support children
at school
in activities
like sport and art.Submitted by elenazheng1211 on
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task response
Provide a more balanced view by acknowledging the potential benefits of sponsoring professional sports and art events in communities.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical structure throughout the essay by using paragraphs to separate different ideas.
lexical resource
Vary your vocabulary and use more precise and specific words and phrases to enhance your essay.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structures and revise any grammar errors or inconsistencies in the essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?