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Band 6.5

The bar chart shows poverty rates by sex and age. They are from the United States in 2008.

The bar chart shows poverty rates by sex and age. They are from the United States in 2008.
#bar #poverty #rates #sex #age #states
The chart illustrates the gender-based and
age
-based proportion rates of poverty in the United States in 2008. It can be seen a notable fluctuation graph shows as children grow older, the poverty rates gradually
declined
Wrong verb form
decline
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 until the
age
group
 of 45 to 54 and
started
Wrong verb form
start
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 slowly to rise
at
Change preposition
apply
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above 55
years
 old. All babies under 5
years
 old, in each gender, had proportion rates of 20%,
while
 children in
age
Add an article
the age
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 range 5 to 17 scored
lower
Correct article usage
a lower
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 percentage at 15%. In
young
Add an article
the young
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 adult category of
age
Wrong verb form
aged
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 18 to 24,15% of
boy
Fix the agreement mistake
boys
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 and 20% of
girl
Fix the agreement mistake
girls
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 suffered in poverty, but the percentage decreases at the
age
 of 25 by around 9% of women and 15% of men. The proportion
continue
Change the verb form
continues
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 to drop
at
Change preposition
from
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 35
years
 old to 44
years
 old with approximately 7% of male and 10% of female. The
age
group
 of 45 to 54 had the lowest rate of all with around 9% in each sex. The rate,
however
, bounced back to almost 10% at the
age
 of 55% to 59% in each gender. It significantly increased
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
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 of 60 to 64 and 65 to 74,
shared
Verb problem
and it was
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Correct article usage
a slightly
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slightly
Change the word
slight
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 amount
at
Change preposition
of
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 around 6% to 10%.
Senior
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The senior
A senior
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group
 at the
age
 of 75
above
Correct word choice
and above
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 got nearly 5% of
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
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 and 10% of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
.
Submitted by matcha on

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words age, group, years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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