Many young people are leaving their homes in rural areas to study or work in the cities. What are the reasons? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #homes #areas #study #work #cities

These days many

people

are migrating to urban areas either for their education or finding job opportunities. There might be two possible reasons for leaving their homes in rural areas and

this

essay will identify if the positives outweigh the negatives.

Firstly

, I would say that there are two possible reasons that can influence

people

to migrate.

This

is because they have various options to choose their desired schools or universities for their education.

In addition

, there are ample job opportunities in various sectors which allows them to earn a high salary and lead a sophisticated lifestyle. There are advantages and disadvantages associated with

this

migration. On the one hand, cities will be overcrowded

due to

an increase in population.

In other words

, if everyone started migrating to urban areas there would not be enough space for accommodation.

Consequently

, the government would destroy the natural resources to meet the growing needs of

people

such

as food, and shelter.

For example

, a recent survey of the environment declares that 60 % of green space has already been replaced by skyscrapers.

On the other hand

people

have an opportunity to lead a sophisticated lifestyle.

This

is to say that, living in a city provides

people

easy access to all facilities

such

as hospitals, public transportation, and shopping centres.

As a result

, they can enjoy a sedentary lifestyle even though they live in apartments or flats.

For instance

, in Canada, they are looking for ways to extend healthcare accessibility for citizens living downtown

due to

overpopulation. In summary,

although

living in the city allows them to access all facilities to lead a healthy life , the impacts

due to

destruction of natural resources to provide

such

facilities has a significant impact on the environment, which results in deforestation and global warming. In my opinion, the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.

Submitted by jeeanay on Sat Nov 04 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that your introduction and conclusion are clearly stated and summarize your main points.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples to support your main points.

lexical resource

Expand your range of vocabulary and use more varied and precise language.

grammatical range

Work on improving your sentence structure and grammar accuracy.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

306 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

rural-urban migration
quest
higher education institutions
job markets
allure
healthcare
technological and infrastructural advancements
personal and professional growth
brain drain
cultural shift
traditional values
dilution of cultural identity
overcrowding
pollution
high cost of living

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Many young people are leaving their homes in rural areas to study or work in the cities. What are the reasons? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that success is the best measure for intelligence, while others think that intelligence can be measured in other ways. What is your opinion?

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal life. Does the advantages outweighs the disadvantages.

Some employers are giving more value on hiring people with good social skills apart from good qualifications. Do you agree or disagree that social skills are just as crucial as good qualification for successful work?