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Band 6.5

Some people think that they have a negative influence on people, and therefore should be restricted. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #influence
At current days there are a lot of advertisements, more than in the past. A group of people believe that it is a bad influence on people and should be limited. I do not agree because freedom is one of the pillars of democracy, and restricting announcements is a kind of action against freedom. The advertisements are necessary for the companies to show their brands and products. It is an essential activity to help shops and industries sell their goods.
Besides
, several jobs and professionals depend on
this
 business,
such
 as designers, advertisers, actors, directors, photographers, and others. There is a huge supply chain in
this
 business, and it moves billions of dollars every year.
Moreover
, publicity is the best way for consumers to get information about companies and products.
On the other hand
, some types of announcements can be aggressive, impolite, or appealing, and can influence the customers'
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 in shopping negatively. Despite some drawbacks to allowing all sorts of advertisements, I think it is the price that we have to pay for freedom and democracy. Society should restrict negative content of marketing campaigns by avoiding buying products from enterprises that unrespect the consumer or specific groups. It is not a role of the government or a state agency, but an obligation for all citizens.
To sum up
, I disagree with any type of publicity control by organizations or public authorities,
however
, it is an issue for the community.
Submitted by fmulato on

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task response
Ensure that the essay directly addresses the prompt by clearly expressing your opinion on whether advertisements should be restricted.
coherence and cohesion
Review the logical structure of the essay to ensure that ideas are organized coherently and in a logical manner.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary by using a wider variety of words and phrases to enhance the overall quality of your essay.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammatical accuracy to convey your ideas clearly and effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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