IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Most people agree that pupils should only learn academic subject in school.However, others approach that pupils should also learn how to identify between correct and mistaken.This essay will consider both sides of the discussion.

#people #pupils #school #approach #discussion
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On the one hand, those who support
Use synonyms
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
 should only teach academic
Use synonyms
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
promote
Add the particle
to promote
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 the idea that teachers should only concentrate on academic topics.By
Linking Words
this
Add a comma
this,
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 we mean that teaching staff should improve
youth’s
Change noun form
youth
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 studies.
For example
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, teaching staff should help youths to increase their academic
subject
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 which appears to have a number of high educational in the future.
Furthermore
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, proponents have an opinion because each
families
Change to a singular noun
family
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 have distinct
disciplines
Fix the agreement mistake
discipline
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 and they raise their
children
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may be
Verb problem
apply
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different
Change the word
differently
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with
Change preposition
from
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another household
Fix the agreement mistake
other households
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,
school
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 should not interfere
expect
Verb problem
except by
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 teaching academic
subject
Use synonyms
.
Example
Add an article
An example
The example
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 can be seen in if teaching staff intromit in the raising adolescence,
this
Linking Words
 will disturb parents training.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
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 opponents of
Use synonyms
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
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 should only teach academic
Use synonyms
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
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 claim that because youngsters spend
considerably
Change the adverb
considerable
show examples
 time in
school
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 youngsters should identify between correct and mistaken.
This
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 leads to
children
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grow
Wrong verb form
growing
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 in all aspects
in
Change preposition
of
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 their life.
For
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instance
Add a comma
instance,
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 if
children
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 want to immigrate without their parents they should evaluate the situation right
of
Correct your spelling
or
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 wrong.
Moreover
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, another responsibility of
Use synonyms
school
Add an article
the school
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 is
about working
Change preposition
to work
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 on
youths
Change noun form
youths'
youth's
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personality
Fix the agreement mistake
personalities
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.
This
Linking Words
 means
school
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 has a significant role
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 coaching
children
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.Because
school
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 can effect on youngsters.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
school
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 is a place
that
Correct word choice
where
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children
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 considerably learning in it and because of
this
Linking Words
 teachers should teach
adolescence
Fix the agreement mistake
adolescents
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obviously
Rephrase
apply
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right
of
Change preposition
from
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 wrong. In conclusion, I would tend to side with the opponents of
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school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
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 should
also
Linking Words
 teach immaturity
how
Correct word choice
and how
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 to distinguish correct between
mistaken
Correct word choice
and mistaken
show examples
.It seems to be crucial for immaturity’s future.It would
e
Correct your spelling
be
 more unreasonable to think
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school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
 should just teach academic
Use synonyms
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 because it’s just a
pieace
Correct your spelling
piece
 of
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
 that
children
Use synonyms
 should learn in
school
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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task response
Ensure that the essay fully addresses the prompt and presents a balanced discussion of both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
Improve the overall organization of the essay by providing a clear introduction and conclusion.
lexical resource
Expand the range of vocabulary used and use more precise and appropriate words.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structures and grammar to ensure accuracy and clarity.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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