IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people think modern communication technology is having some negative effects on social relationships. Do you agree or disagree? write an essay

Modern
communication
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technology
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 has
revolutionized
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revolutionised
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 the way we interact, but it has
also
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 sparked debate about its impact on social
relationships
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.
While
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 some argue that it strengthens connections, I agree that it has had negative effects on social
relationships
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. One significant negative effect of modern
communication
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technology
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 is the reduction of face-to-face
interactions
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. As people increasingly rely on messaging apps, social media, and video calls, they tend to
prioritize
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prioritise
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 online
communication
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 over in-person meetings.
This
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 shift can lead to a weakened sense of connection, as non-verbal cues like body language and eye contact, which are essential for building trust and understanding, are often lost in digital
communication
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.
For instance
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, a study found that frequent use of social media platforms like Facebook can lead to feelings of loneliness, as people replace genuine
relationships
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 with superficial online
interactions
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. Another adverse impact of modern
communication
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technology
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 is the erosion of
communication
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 skills. The convenience and brevity of text messaging and social media have led to a decline in the ability to engage in deep, meaningful conversations. People are increasingly accustomed to short, fragmented exchanges, which can reduce their capacity to express themselves clearly and understand others fully.
For example
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, the younger generation, who grew up with smartphones, often struggle with face-to-face conversations, as they are more comfortable communicating through text or emojis, which lack the depth and nuance of spoken language. In conclusion,
while
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 modern
communication
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technology
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 has its benefits,
it is clear that
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 it has negatively affected social
relationships
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 by reducing face-to-face
interactions
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 and eroding essential
communication
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 skills. To foster healthier
relationships
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, it is crucial to strike a balance between online and offline
interactions
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.

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strength
Your view is clear and you take the side you want to show. Keep this in all parts of the essay.
tip
Make each idea link to the main view with easy logic. Show more proof for each point.
grammar
Check grammar in small spots, such as 'younger generation ... often struggle' which should be 'struggles'.
content
Use more clear examples and explain them a bit more.
development
Add a short view that is opposite, then say why your view still wins.
task response
Clear stance that modern tech harms social ties.
coherence
Good order with start, middle, and end.
coherence
Useful links like 'Another adverse impact' and 'In conclusion.'
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • face-to-face interactions
  • messaging apps
  • social media
  • non-verbal cues
  • family bonds
  • dependency
  • digital communication
  • superficial relationships
  • cyberbullying
  • online harassment
  • social isolation
  • virtual connections
  • emotional satisfaction
  • real-life interactions
  • technological intrusion
What to do next:
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