Many old cities around the world are going through a major process of modernisation. What are the advantages and disadvantages of modernisation?

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this

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contemporary era, a plethora of regions around the globe are experiencing significant changes to become more modern areas than before.

Modernisation

Use synonyms

is an instrumental tool to improve people's ways of living.

However

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, several severe physical problems have emerged

as a result

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of the modern transportation system that directly affects people's health. To embark on,

modernisation

Use synonyms

supplies individuals with comfortable ways of living

Remove the comma

apply

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and assists them to perfectly adapt to the fast-paced lifestyle.

In other words

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, numerous employees have a limited timeframe

due to

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their hectic schedules that require a certain way of commuting.

Accordingly

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, when a city embraces change through the construction of up-to-date infrastructures and facilities

such

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as new metro lines, it will significantly assist its citizens with their needs and eventually their productivity will

subsequently

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increase .

In addition

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to that modern countries have reaped benefits in terms of increasing number of tourists who may like to see and experience these modern places.

Accordingly

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, the economy of these countries will flourish.

For instance

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, In Japan, the number of tourists has sharply

uplifted

Verb problem

increased

show examples

recently, when the Japanese government decided to attract their attention by providing them with the latest and most modern technologies .

Nevertheless

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, despite the aforementioned point, it can still be claimed that

modernisation

Use synonyms

has its own demerits because of its negative impact on the environment. To illustrate, the dramatic rise in the number of factories and vehicles

along with

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trees that had cleared to make way for roads and railways has a detrimental impact on the ecosystem because it participates in reducing the plant coverage.

Moreover

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, the amount of vehicle exhaust has sharply increased.

As a result

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, several physical illnesses have occurred

such

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as pulmonary diseases and lung cancer.

This

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can be exemplified by an article carried out by a group of American medical researchers who claimed that one out of three patients is suffering from lung cancer, and the incidence of lung cancer has gradually climbed in cities compared to the countryside

due to

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the high level of carbon dioxide in urban areas. In conclusion,

after

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this

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essay has reiterated the above-mentioned points, it can be asserted that

although

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modernisation

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plays an indispensable role in facilitating many people's lives by providing them with up-to-date transportation means ,

as well as

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, developing the economy of many countries , it

also

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the main reason behind the emergence of many serious diseases.

Submitted by Drfatima.Abdullah on Sun Nov 05 2023

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task response

Ensure that all parts of the essay prompt are addressed in the response.

coherence and cohesion

Organize the ideas into clear paragraphs with topic sentences.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance the clarity and sophistication of the essay.

grammatical range

Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to avoid errors and improve overall clarity.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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17
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

394 words

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Many old cities around the world are going through a major process of modernisation. What are the advantages and disadvantages of modernisation?

Include an introduction and conclusion

You are going to visit the town where your friend went to university. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: • explain why you will be visiting the town • give details of where you will be staying • ask your friend to recommend some evening entertainment.

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages. If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how?

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.