The bar chart shows the results of the survey conducted over a three-year period to discover what people who live in London thought of the city
The bar graph display
of
the survey from 3 years to Change preposition
apply
represents
Wrong verb form
represent
London
citizen
thoughts of their city.
Change noun form
citizen'
Overall
, range
of shops Correct article usage
the range
are
still in demand Change the verb form
is
of
Change preposition
for
people
in London
. It shows in three years, range
of shops Correct article usage
the range
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
high
Change preposition
in high
demands
with around 40 Fix the agreement mistake
demand
percents
, followed by work occupation with 35 Fix the agreement mistake
percent
percents
. Fix the agreement mistake
percent
Mixture
of Add an article
A mixture
The mixture
people
is also
in
the list with Change preposition
on
stagnant
graph, meaning Correct article usage
a stagnant
of
many races Change preposition
apply
are lived
in Wrong verb form
live
London
. In number fourth, with Correct article usage
a steady
steady
rise is Museums & Art Galleries. Correct article usage
a steady
Moreover
, night life
and transportation manage to fluctuate.
Many Correct your spelling
nightlife
persons
agreeReplace the word
people
,
Remove the comma
apply
range
of shops is the most valuable Correct article usage
the range
things
in Fix the agreement mistake
thing
London
. Considering job opportunities in London
, there is no doubt that many corporations are open to undergraduate
. Citizens have Fix the agreement mistake
undergraduates
same
thoughts Correct article usage
the same
with
many Change preposition
as
nation
Change to a plural noun
nations
lived
in Wrong verb form
living
London
and other aspects below, make overall
satisfaction of people
in London
.
By the
time of other aspects, many Change preposition
The
people
come to London
to
recreation, regarding to many things can be Change preposition
for
discover
Wrong verb form
discovered
such
as museums & art galleries with a lot of discoveries. Other than that, night life
is the most common Correct your spelling
nightlife
things
for Fix the agreement mistake
thing
people
to come in
Change preposition
to
London
with adequate transportation.Submitted by hwidyadana on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words london, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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