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Band 2

Which problems the global warming can cause? Scarcity food

#scarcity #food
Nowadays, we tackle many problems because the Global warming. the mean is the shortage of food for the
animal
Fix the agreement mistake
animals
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 due
the
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to the
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 dry. With
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Global warming, we have less rain and
consequently
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consequently,
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this
provoke
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provokes
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 scarcity
food
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of food
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 and many death of animals. In Africa,
for example
, the leopard
have
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has
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many
Correct your spelling
any
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 problems
about
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with
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this
, because, many times it must search
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for another
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another animals
Replace the adjective
another animal
other animals
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 and
this
 not is possible
find
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to find
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in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
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 one or two days. Only 5% of leopards become adults due
the
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to the
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 scarcity
food
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of food
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. Increase spread of
insect borne
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insect-borne
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 disease. The increase in temperature and the change in precipitation regimes allow for a greater spread of things
such
 as malaria, dengue,
lyme
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Lyme
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 disease and other insects that are transported in large quantities in their habitat. Another problem is increasingly poor air quality. The warmer temperatures can lead to increased ground-level ozone
formationand
Correct your spelling
formation and
formation
 worsened particulate matter pollution.
in
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To
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 sum up
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Global warming
provoke
Wrong verb form
has provoked
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 many problems and lost
lifes
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lives
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, because many animals and people can
died
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die
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with
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from
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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Global warming.
Submitted by paulacosentino1 on

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coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of your essay. Ensure that your ideas are presented in a clear and organized manner.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present but need further development to effectively frame your essay. Focus on providing a clear introduction to the topic and a conclusive summary of your main points.
task achievement
You need to provide more relevant and specific examples to support your main points. Ensure that your examples are directly related to the topic and contribute to the overall coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Ensure that you fully address the task prompt and provide a comprehensive response to the topic. Your ideas should be well-developed and clearly presented to demonstrate a deeper understanding of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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