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Band 3

Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems.

#overpopulation #areas #two #ones #governments #individuals
Urbanization has led to numerous
problems
, like illegal encroachment on the natural environment ,
water
 scarcity, and improper
waste
 disposal. The illegal disposal of
waste
 has led to severe
problems
, like pollution. The solution for
this
 problem could be solved by proper solid and liquid
waste
 disposal
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
show examples
 and
water
 scarcity could be sorted out by solutions like
rain
Correct your spelling
rainwater
show examples
water
 harvesting . The
problems
Fix the agreement mistake
problem
show examples
due to
 rapid urbanisation is the encroachment of natural environments like paddy fields , forests, etc.
This
 could lead to
further
 depletion of biodiversity. The improper disposal of liquid and solid
waste
 could lead to pollution.
This
 could harm the other beings living in that particular area. The construction of high-rise
bulidings
Correct your spelling
buildings
 has led to
shortage
Add an article
a shortage
show examples
 of
water
 supply. The solution to the problem could be done through proper urban planning by the government. The building communities should promote a proper
waste
 disposal system. The people living in the particular area should plant more native or local plants and trees to stop the depletion of biodiversity. In summary, urbanization leads to a higher standard of living and provides good job opportunities for people in urban
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
.
Nevertheless
, if it is not done with a vision of proper planning it could create
heath
Correct your spelling
health
show examples
problems
 and it could
also
 damage the natural environment.
Submitted by crpnivedya.prasannan on

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coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of the essay by organizing your ideas more clearly and coherently. Ensure that the introduction contains a clear thesis statement, and the conclusion provides a summary of the main points.
task achievement
The essay adequately addresses the prompt and provides relevant examples to support the arguments. However, the response could be more comprehensive and demonstrate a deeper analysis of the issues.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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