Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

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It has been argued that one of the best outcomes for traffic congestion and air pollution problems is increasing the price of fuel. In my opinion, I completely disagree with

this

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idea and will explain it

further

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On the other hand

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, the higher price of petrol makes vehicle users convert their transportation mode. Workers as the biggest user of private transportation will begin to use Trans-Jakarta, LRT or MRT and soon the problems might be solved.

However

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, traders

also

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need to deliver their kinds of stuff by cars or trucks

as a result

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this

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will lead to other problems

such

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as increasing daily grocery prices and

also

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will be followed by the increase in other services prices. Another possible solution to cope with

this

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problem is converting the type of

vehicles

Use synonyms

into more environmentally friendly ones. Some companies have developed electric

vehicles

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which enable them to run without gas emissions

thus

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means the reduction of air pollution.

Additionally

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, allowing half of the employees of the company to work from home is the best answer to reduce the traffic jam.

For example

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, some companies in Jakarta have been scheduling workforce arrival to office and 3 days office workday. These rules will be applied interchangeably to minimize the number of cars or other

vehicles

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in the street, especially during rush hours. In conclusion, despite accomplishing the problem, raising the fuel price can lead to higher daily service and material prices so it would be better to change the transportation mode in electric

vehicles

Use synonyms

and companies to adjust the regulations for the employees’ office attendance.

christineangela59Fri Jul 12 2024

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task achievement

While the essay presents a clear response to the task, the structure could be improved by clearly stating your disagreement in the introductory paragraph and outlining the main points you will discuss.

task achievement

Further develop your points by providing additional specific examples or supporting details. This will add depth to your argument and make it more robust.

coherence cohesion

The essay could benefit from clearer transitions between paragraphs to improve the flow of ideas. Use linking words and phrases to achieve this.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and that this idea is related to the overall argument of the essay. This will enhance the logical structure of your essay.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction clearly outlines your position on the topic, and the conclusion effectively summarizes your main points.

relevant specific examples

The essay contains relevant ideas and examples, such as the impact of increased fuel prices on groceries and the benefits of electric vehicles.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Discourage
Incentivize
Alternative energy
Public transportation
Lower-income
Carpool
Ride-sharing
Congestion
Urban planning
Pedestrian-friendly
Tax incentives
Electric and hybrid vehicles
Emissions standards
Cleaner vehicles
Congestion charges
Bicycle lanes
Sustainable

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Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

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