IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

People are having more free time and more money available to spend on leisure events. A considerable amount of capital is being spent by humans in participating in cultural or sports activities. This essay will discuss the reasons why this is an excellent way to spent money in order to grow as an individual in various areas of life such as psychological health and emotional intelligence.

#people #time #money #leisure #events #amount #humans #sports #activities #areas #life #health #intelligence
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The graphical representation offers a comprehensive exploration of the intricate dynamics surrounding the integration of renewable
energy
 into the broader landscape of total
energy
 supply across four distinct nations during the temporal intervals of 1997, 2000, and 2010. A discernible trend emerges, portraying
Iceland
 as a frontrunner in its unwavering commitment to renewable sources, consistently outpacing its counterparts. Notably,
Iceland
's
trajectory
unfolds
Wrong verb form
unfolded
show examples
 as a steadfast ascent,
initiating
Verb problem
starting
show examples
 at 45% in 1997, escalating to 60% in 2000, and culminating at an impressive 70% by 2010.
This
 remarkable consistency positions
Iceland
 as a vanguard in the global pursuit of sustainable
energy
 solutions. In stark contrast,
Turkey
's renewable
energy
 narrative is characterized by a more intricate and undulating pattern. Hovering just below 40% in 1997, the percentage marginally surpassed 40% in 2000 before undergoing a measured descent to approximately 32% in 2010. These fluctuations,
while
 emblematic of
Turkey
's engagement with renewable
energy
, underscore the multifaceted nature of its journey in
energy
 diversification over the scrutinized period. The
trajectory
 of
Turkey
, punctuated by peaks and troughs, reflects the evolving nature of its approach to renewable
energy
 integration. Meanwhile, Australia and Sweden consistently find themselves occupying the lower echelons of the renewable
energy
 spectrum. Australia's
trajectory
,
initiating
Verb problem
starting
show examples
 at 9% in 1997,
undergoes
Wrong verb form
underwent
show examples
 a gradual and persistent decline, reaching a mere 4% by 2010.
In contrast
, Sweden, commencing at 5% in 1997, showcases a continuous, albeit modest, upward
trajectory
, nearly doubling its initial percentage to reach 10% by the close of the examined decade in 2010. These disparate paths underscore the diversity of global approaches to renewable
energy
 adoption, with each nation navigating its unique
trajectory
 within the broader context of sustainable
energy
 transitions. In summary, the graphical representation provides a nuanced narrative of each nation's evolving stance on renewable
energy
.
Iceland
 emerges as a steadfast leader,
Turkey
 navigates through nuanced fluctuations,
while
 Australia and Sweden persistently occupy the lower rungs of the renewable
energy
 spectrum. The interplay of these trajectories offers valuable insights into the global landscape of sustainable
energy
 transitions over the designated temporal intervals.
Submitted by umark5353 on

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task response
Ensure to stick to the specific prompt and provide a clear and concise response without going off-topic.
coherence and cohesion
Overall, the essay demonstrates a good logical structure and coherence. Ensure to link ideas and paragraphs more explicitly for improved clarity.
lexical resource
The essay displays a commendable range of vocabulary and uses terminology effectively to convey precise meaning. Continue to integrate a variety of lexical resources to enhance the depth of expression.
grammatical range
The grammatical range is generally strong, with varied sentence structures. Work on reducing minor errors, such as subject-verb agreement and preposition usage for increased accuracy.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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