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Band 3

Some people think that tourism is one of the helpful ways to increase a countries state. However, others believe that tourism can only damage traditional rules bringing own affect to a society and cause other troubles. To what extent do you agree with?

#people #tourism #countries #damage #rules #society #troubles
In the contemporary era, tourism is a very important financial source for
bit
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a bit
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 a quite
countries
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few countries
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. Some
belive
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believe
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 that
this
 would improve the land situation
while
 others see it as a
threating
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threat
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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traditional wealth. In my front of view, tourism is an
eminance
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economic
 factor for
rising
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the rising
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 quality of population lives. I will elaborate on my perspective in the following paragraphs. To commence with, visitors who come to different countries contribute to
enhance
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enhancing
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 its economic situation .
For example
, many cities which have
a
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apply
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breathtaking landscapes or unique religious
locatoins
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locations
 would be the
denstination
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destination
 of
enormous
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the enormous
an enormous
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 amount of tourists and when those reach their
destinatin
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destination
, they would buy meals or snacks there or variable small pieces for memory and spend not a
little
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small
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 amount of
moneny
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money
 there.
On the other hand
, some
beilive
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believe
 that strangers may affect negatively the civilization of the specific area by
damagaing
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damaging
 the
well known
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well-known
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 traditional rules,
for instance
, visitors may act or dress in a different way than locals something that would be
cirtified
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certified
 by older residents on one hand and be cited by the
youngersts
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youngest
on the other hand
 and by
this
 to change the familiar way of lifestyle.
To conclude
, I think that tourism has much more
pors
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pros
 than coins, but locals may do their efforts to keep their own rules and at the same time
to
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apply
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enjoy the financial advantages of living in
such
 attractive places.
Submitted by leenaasalee on

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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks clear organization and coherence. The ideas are presented in a disjointed manner. There is a need for better planning and structuring of the essay.
task achievement
The essay provides some relevant points but lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. The ideas are not developed cohesively. The response to the task is incomplete and lacks comprehensive ideas.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary. There are issues with word choice and expression. The essay lacks lexical coherence and precision.
grammatical range
There are numerous grammatical errors in the essay, including issues with verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. The essay lacks grammatical accuracy and complexity.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • boost
  • economy
  • cultural exchange
  • over-tourism
  • environmental impacts
  • cultural heritage
  • strain
  • local resources
  • commercialization
  • traditions
  • exacerbate
  • inequality
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