Some people think that children should be raised by all the family members (e.g. Uncle, aunt and grandparents) rather than only parents. Give your opinion.

Some

society

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societies

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believe that

kids

should

be grow

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grow

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up

by

Change preposition

apply

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the

Correct article usage

apply

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involve

Wrong verb form

involved

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of

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with

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all the family

member

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members

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such

as

uncle

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uncles

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,

aunt

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aunts

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and grandparents rather than only

parents

.

This

essay will disagree with

this

opinion since the

children

's development should be

handle

Wrong verb form

handled

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by the

parents

without any distraction from other parties.

This

essay will first explain

abou

Correct your spelling

about

the reason why

parents

hold the crucial work to raise their

children

and continue to deliver the disadvantage if other people

involve

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involved

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in the development of

children

. As the

children

's first place to learn about the world,

parents

are the most important person that should

be

Unnecessary verb

apply

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handle their

kids

Change to a genitive case

kid's

kids'

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life

. The

children

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children's

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first

life

stage is the time when they start to understand things and

this

stage needs

parents'

Correct article usage

the parents'

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role to teach their

kids

about

life

so the

kids

can only accept the right information from their

parents

without the distraction from

others family

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other families

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.

Moreover

, each

people

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person

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has their own beliefs on something that might be not suitable

with

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for

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the

kids

even

it

Correct word choice

if it

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is their closest relatives

such

as grandparents, uncles and aunts.

For instance

, the

parents

teach their child to be independent

while

the grandparents spoil them with everything.

Furthermore

, the

involve

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involvement

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of other people in

kids

'

life

can affect the quality of their

life

. They might

be confuse

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be confused

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with the information or knowledge which they should understand or use

it

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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in daily

life

.

This

create

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creates

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the awareness for the

parents

to be more

care

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careful

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while

raising their

kids

in order to save their

children

's future by taking good care of their personal

life

and mental health that can be affected by how they raise them. In conclusion, it is

more

Change the word

apply

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better for

the

Correct article usage

apply

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children

to be

handle

Wrong verb form

handled

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by their

parents

over their relatives to reach

the

Correct article usage

a

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good quality of

life

that

affect

Correct subject-verb agreement

affects

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to

Change preposition

apply

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their future.