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Writing Samples
Band 6

Success is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person?

#success #wealth #belongings #measure #person
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Modern schools provide opportunities for smart learning systems, which enhance children's computer skills.
However
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, some
students
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 prefer the traditional educational approach, where knowledge is acquired from books, handwritten notes, and other paper-based resources. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss both perspectives, highlighting their pros and cons. The old educational
system
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 provided a solid foundation of knowledge over the decades.
Students
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 engaged in lessons by writing essays on paper and completing exercises in notebooks.
For instance
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, when the teacher made notes on the blackboard,
students
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 paid close attention, carefully observing each letter written.
This
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 teaching method was effective and robust. During review sessions,
students
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 would compete to demonstrate their understanding of the topics.
However
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, traditional education
had
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has
show examples
 its drawbacks.
Firstly
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, lessons tended to be noisy.
Secondly
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, during exams and assessments, some
students
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' handwriting was unclear, leading to time-consuming evaluation processes. In today's electronic education
system
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, lessons can be conducted in a faster and more dynamic manner. Teachers can assess tests without struggling to decipher
students
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' handwriting, expediting the evaluation process. The computer-based
system
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also
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 helps
students
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 become proficient in academic and professional digital skills.
For example
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, they learn to work with various types of documents and develop fast typing skills.
Nevertheless
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,
students
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, being children, often tend to use computers for playing games, which can impact their learning process. In conclusion, transitioning from a paper-based education
system
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 to a computer-based one offers numerous advantages.
However
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, teachers must closely monitor
students
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' progress to ensure they do not neglect their academic responsibilities.
Submitted by zakhra.aliyeva2001 on

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task response
Ensure that your examples directly relate to the question and clearly support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is generally good, but ensure that your ideas are linked more effectively between sentences and paragraphs.
lexical resource
Your use of vocabulary is varied and effective, but make sure to include more precise and varied vocabulary to enhance your arguments.
grammatical range
While your sentence structures are mostly accurate, work on using more complex sentence structures to showcase a wider range of grammar.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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