Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

These days there is an argument about a lot of choices we face. I strongly agree with

this

statement because thanks to technology has jumped up over the years which can provide information and reconnect with people’s relatives in many ways which brings humanity to many choices. The main point is that on the internet, individuals can search for every detail they want without a filter.

However

, these would affect human psychology, as people tend to consume all of the information which eventually leads to confusion.

For instance

, a teacher from Insan Cendekia Boarding School reported that 43% of senior students there have a hard time choosing their university. It is all because everything they see on the internet makes them interested and it

also

makes it hard for them to decide the best based on many of the advertisements from each university.

In addition

, nowadays there are many different types of applications that can help individuals keep in touch with families and friends.

Moreover

this

causes bewilderment among people about which applications suit them.

For example

, when I was in senior high school in 2022, a bunch of my friends had three software to chat because their relatives

also

used different types of apps.

However

this

is beneficial for them to start learning new things to keep up with the technology. In conclusion, I extremely agree with a lot of choices we have in

this

century.

Although

it creates a lot of things

such

as providing knowledge and creating bonds between people’s

relative

Fix the agreement mistake

relatives

show examples

, it makes individuals

felt

Wrong verb form

feel

show examples

confused.

Submitted by heyyo on Mon Nov 13 2023

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coherence cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is weak and the introduction and conclusion need improvement. The essay provides some relevant points but lacks a comprehensive response to the task.

task achievement

The essay partially addresses the task but fails to provide a complete and comprehensive response. The ideas are somewhat clear but lack development and depth. More relevant and specific examples are needed to support the main points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

259 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

overwhelmed
decision fatigue
paralysis by analysis
consumerism
globalization
personal autonomy
market saturation
option overload
decision-making process
psychological well-being
buyer's remorse
customization
trade-offs
minimalism
information superhighway

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Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Billions of dollars are being wasted each year on space research. The money could be better used to improve conditions on earth. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Q. Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Addiction to the Internet is a widespread problem. What problems does this causes? What is a suitable solution

In contemporary society, everyone should have equal opportunities in education. Therefore, universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is not necessary for people to travel to other places to learn about the culture. We can learn as much as from books, films and the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?