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In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #people #population #governments #society
In today’s era, it is found that
people
 have a
long
Correct word choice
longer
show examples
 life than before. Some
society
Fix the agreement mistake
societies
show examples
 think that older
people
 will bring many problems to the
government
. Yet, some believe that older
people
 have significant positive impacts on
society
. Speaking of that, I believe that elderly
people
 will give many benefits to
society
 rather than its drawbacks. Armed with the experience of the national history back
then
 in the past year, the
golden-ager
Fix the agreement mistake
golden-agers
show examples
 could be the best teacher to pass their knowledge to the young generation. It will become a good way to preserve the national historical background in
this
 era because the interest in the historical past is now severely diminished. With the existence of elderly
people
, I believe that they can increase the awareness of the historical background of the nation.
Moreover
, elderly
people
 can help protect the culture, seeing how the modern era sharply developing. Regularly, older
people
 are more likely to follow the customs and norms that have been patented in
society
, which I believe should be maintained because it shows the identity of the
people
. By keeping the culture exist, it will boost the understanding of young
people
 in terms of how they represent the community. In conclusion,
although
 some
people
 say that the older generation tends to create problems for the
government
, it is not the only aspect to see. Having a lot of elderly
people
 can help
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
preserve the nation’s history and culture, which are vital points for the
government
.
In other words
, having elderly
people
 will give benefits to the
government
 as well.
Submitted by asyifannisakh on

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Task Response
Ensure a clear position on the topic throughout the essay
Coherence and Cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words to improve coherence and cohesion
Lexical Resource
Expand the use of advanced vocabulary and varied sentence structures
Grammatical Range
Work on accuracy of sentence structures and use of complex grammar

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ageing population
  • benefits
  • disadvantages
  • advantages
  • experience
  • knowledge
  • contribution
  • economy
  • society
  • healthcare
  • youth employment
  • community
  • intergenerational support
  • volunteerism
  • mentorship
  • increased demand
  • pension costs
  • social welfare systems
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • intergenerational conflict
  • technological adaptability
  • dependency
  • effective
  • skill development
  • employment opportunities
  • intergenerational solidarity
  • communication
  • lifelong learning
  • technological literacy
  • age-friendly
  • social policies
  • infrastructure
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