IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

In recent times, many people have been focused on bacteria associated with toilet visits and question whether sitting down when peeing is a good idea. To minimise the spread of bacteria, people shouldn't sit down on the toilet seat. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#times #people #bacteria #toilet #visits #idea #minimise #spread #shouldn #seat
More and more
people
fouced
Correct your spelling
focus
 on the bacteria
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public society. Some
people
arugement
Correct your spelling
argue
 that when using public
toilet
Fix the agreement mistake
toilets
show examples
 should not sit down on the
toilet
 set because of hygiene practices. I do agree with the statement,
some
Correct word choice
that some
show examples
people
 do not clean after use and bacterial contamination
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
build up each time
also
 there is
contain
Verb problem
apply
show examples
personal cleanliness. Bacteria grow fast
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
 in wet and dirty
environment
Fix the agreement mistake
environments
show examples
. Most
batcterias
Correct your spelling
bacteria
bacterias
batteries
 like to live in
warm
Add an article
a warm
show examples
 moist and messy
environment
Fix the agreement mistake
environments
show examples
,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 makes them grow
quick
Change the word
quickly
show examples
,
also
 flies will carry
viurs
Correct your spelling
virus
 and
separeted
Correct your spelling
separated
 to
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 or animals.
For example
,
people
 after using
toilet
Add an article
the toilet
show examples
 if there is a drop of pee on the
sit
Correct your spelling
seat
show examples
 without
wipe
Change the verb form
wiping
show examples
 it off each time will help
bacterias
Fix the agreement mistake
bacteria
show examples
 to
bulid
Correct your spelling
build
 up
perfect
Add an article
the perfect
a perfect
show examples
 place to live. Personal hygiene practices play a crucial role in reducing the risk of bacterial contamination in the bathroom. In that case, using public
toilet
Fix the agreement mistake
toilets
show examples
consider
Wrong verb form
is considered
show examples
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
personal cleanliness.
For example
,
this
 type of
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
show examples
 will always carry
disinfact
Correct your spelling
disinfect
disinfects
 in their bag
although
 even calean they still have a problem
to sit
Change the verb form
sitting
show examples
 down on the sit. In conclusion, bacteria is a big part
to consider
Change preposition
of considering
show examples
people
to sit
Change the verb form
sitting
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
share
Change the verb form
shared
show examples
 bathroom and
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
 who
are care
Change the verb form
care
show examples
 about personal hygiene.
Submitted by kimi080810 on

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task response
The essay presents a clear response to the task but lacks detailed development and explanation. It needs to provide more comprehensive ideas and relevant examples to strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear logical structure. It needs better organization and a more coherent flow of information to improve the overall coherence and cohesion.
lexical resource
The essay shows a limited range of vocabulary and lacks precision in word choice. It needs to use a wider range of vocabulary to express ideas clearly and effectively.
grammatical range
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including problems with verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and word usage. It needs to demonstrate better control of grammar and sentence structures to improve clarity.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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