In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

Nowadays, criminal offences are increasing overnight in most of the countries. In

this

essay, I will describe the main reasons for committing crimes and provide some solutions. There are a number of reasons why violation increases day by day in society. One possible reason is that a lack of police on the street can result in more opportunities for

crime

. These kinds of situations are being sought out by criminals who are concerned for society or an individual.

As a result

people

do not feel comfortable when they are staying at home are going to outside places.

Secondly

, poverty encourages some

people

to turn to

crime

in order to pay bills and meet family requirements or responsibilities.

In addition

, unemployment

also

leads to

crime

due to

financial pressure that’s why

people

are very much committed to doing

crime

On the other hand

, there are many solutions to overcome these kinds of situations.

Firstly

, to reduce the

crime

rate, the government should increase social benefits to alleviate poverty. If the government train offenders in prison to develop new skills, it might bring positive feedback in the future.

Secondly

, seeing more police officers on the street might put

people

off criminal behaviour.

Moreover

, harsher punishment can deter

people

from

crime

. Only harsher punishment decreased criminal offence significantly.

Therefore

, Offenders are determined to never do

this

kind of activity. In conclusion, the government should handle these kinds of crimes strictly by imposing hard lines or recruiting many police officers to secure the country and

also

have to provide job offers or pay money as a gift for doing something else.

Submitted by ielts on Wed Nov 15 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence and cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are not well developed and lack clarity and coherence.

task achievement

The essay provides relevant examples and ideas, but the response could be more comprehensive and specific to the task question. The conclusion could summarize the main points better.

grammatical range

There are issues with sentence structure, vocabulary choices, and punctuation. Complex sentences are attempted, but with inaccuracies and errors.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

267 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

economic disparity
propensity
recidivism
deterrent
rehabilitative
judicial system
corruption
socioeconomic
alienation
stigmatization
decriminalization
enforcement
gentrification
preemptive measures
intervention strategies

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
The pie charrs show a range or areas that people in Japan and Malaysia spend a money a year
The pie charts compare the expenditure of household in Japan and Malaysia in terms of five different categories.
6.5
band
Since most information about culture and history can be found online, museums and art galleries are no longer needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The Internet gives us instant access to a mine of information on almost any subject. It is considered by some individuals that museums and art galleries are not needed anymore, as everything is available online. I strongly disagree with this view and the reasons for the same are discussed in the following paragraphs.
5
band
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opmion
Advertisement play a crucial role in business sector as well as people lives. Some claim that adverts can foster to buy products by detail description of the things while others say that it just a normal thing the population do not pay focus on. I strongly agree with the latter opinion for the following reasons.
7
band
Many people like to wear fashionable clothes. Why do you think this is the case? Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Many individuals tend to follow the latest fashion rules. There are some reasons for this trend as well as a couple of negative consequences, which we will discuss here.
5
band
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Children are able to get everything whether they do their upmost - It is told in several societies. Though this can motivate children to conquere different ups and downs of their lives, there are also some negative effects of this kind of motivation.

In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The pie charrs show a range or areas that people in Japan and Malaysia spend a money a year

Since most information about culture and history can be found online, museums and art galleries are no longer needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opmion

Many people like to wear fashionable clothes. Why do you think this is the case? Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?