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In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

#cultures #children #message
Children
 have flexible minds and behaviours. Whatever is taught to them
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at in
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in
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an
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 early
ages
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age
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 builds their personality. Different cultures teach different things, but some cultures focus on teaching
children
 that they can achieve anything by working hard. Making
children
 learn
this
 certainly has advantages, but it
also
 has
come
Correct your spelling
some
show examples
 drawbacks.
Firstly
, by telling
children
 the importance of hard
work
,
parents
 try to enhance their working habits.
For instance
, a child is told that you can get a chocolate after you have set all your toys
in
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on
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 the shelf. Now
this
 gives an impression to the kid that once he has done some
work
,
then
 he will get what he wants.
Such
 situations build up their confidence and hardworking nature, and
children
then
 utilise these qualities in later years of life too.
Secondly
 ,it helps
children
 to be zealous, ambitious and even creative. The thought that they can achieve anything helps them in thinking out of the box and pursuing their interest and dreams.
On the other hand
, sometimes
parents
 get so hard on
children
. Many
parents
 force their
children
 to
work
 more;
therefore
, creating a stressful situation for them. Other times it
also
 leads to different health issues, so
such
 things should not be taught forcefully.
In addition
 to
this
 , some
children
 can develop pride and ego and might not be able to cope
up
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apply
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with failures. It is important to teach
children
 to
work
 hard;
however
, it is equally important to teach them coping mechanisms when they
will
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apply
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fail. Summing it up, there are both pros and cons to teaching
children
 to
work
 hard. Despite
of
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apply
show examples
parents
 being hard and
children
 not coping with failures, the ambitions and characteristics it builds outweigh and are more beneficial in the
long-term
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long term
show examples
.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each main idea is fully developed within its paragraph and links clearly to the thesis statement.
task achievement
Focus on providing clear examples and evidence for each point raised.
coherence cohesion
Although the structure is present, more careful planning could enhance the logical flow of the essay.
task achievement
For task achievement, aim for a more balanced discussion on both sides of the argument and a stronger conclusion to reflect this.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
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