In recent years, online education is becoming more and more popular. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this phenomenon? Use specific details and examples to explain your opinion.

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Due to
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the COVID-19 outbreak in 2019, studying online become preferable to conventional one. In fact,
it is clear that
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this
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shift could bring benefits to
people
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who have limited access to formal learning.
Although
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the supremacy of
this
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transformation is undeniable,
this
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essay argues that the demerits
also
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have to be considered.
To begin
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with, the foremost advantage is flexibility. Encouragement by massive restrictions in many sectors including school activities during the pandemic has led
people
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to adapt by studying through online platforms anytime and anywhere.
In addition
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, the situation
also
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gives every person the same opportunity to get a proper
education
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.
For instance
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,
according to
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our statistics bureau's data, the number of Indonesian
people
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who get access to formal
education
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is
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apply
show examples
jumped by 20% from 2019 to 2021.
On the other hand
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,
this
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phenomenon
also
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brings demerits , especially for our social relationships which become less frequent than before.
Furthermore
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, some of us tend to become awkward when meeting others in person
due to
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the lack of exposure to physical engagement. To illustrate, there is a significant difference when we communicate through online chatting which don't need to maintain intonation and gesture of our body.
However
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, in direct conversation, those aspects play an integral role in conveying our message.
To conclude
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, despite the drawbacks brought by the popularity of online schooling that leads
people
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to have a hard time when talking in person, I believe that the flexibility of virtual
education
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still becomes the winning solution to broaden our
education
Use synonyms
services.
Submitted by dowjones on

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Coherence and Cohesion
The essay presents a logical structure with an identifiable introduction and conclusion. Main points are supported but could be developed further with richer detail and a more comprehensive examination of each point.
Task Achievement
The response generally addresses the task with relevant points but would benefit from more specific examples and details to fully satisfy the prompt. The advantages and disadvantages mentioned require richer elaboration.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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