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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The provided table gives information about projected costings between three different area of enviromental projects that are counted in US dollars. The pie chart illustrates the expected outcome during the first year as projects are set up.

The provided table gives information about projected costings between three different area of enviromental projects that are counted in US dollars. The pie chart illustrates the expected outcome during the first year as projects are set up.
The table depicts the forecasted
costings
Use synonyms
 over the next five years in
american
Change the capitalization
American
show examples
 dollars for three environmental plans for continual forest cultivation and the pie chart illustrates the presumed
expenditure
Use synonyms
 breakdown allocation for the first
year
Use synonyms
 as plans are set up.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 in
South-east
Correct your spelling
Southeast
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 Asia the
Use synonyms
costings
Replace the word
costs
show examples
 are planned to be increased
whereas
Linking Words
 in
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 two
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
 the numbers are to reduce,
additionally
Linking Words
,
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
half of the
expenditure
Use synonyms
 will be spent on salaries. In West
Africa
Add a comma
Africa,
show examples
 the
costings
Use synonyms
 are projected to continually fall,from 10.5
million
Use synonyms
 in the first
year
Use synonyms
 to three times less in the fifth
year
Use synonyms
 (3.5
million
Use synonyms
).
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in Central
America
Add a comma
America,
show examples
 the numbers in the second
year
Use synonyms
 will be considerably less than in the first
year
Use synonyms
, prior to
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 three years,in which the
costings
Use synonyms
 will remain the same.
In contrast
Linking Words
, in
South-east
Correct your spelling
Southeast
show examples
 Asia the numbers are planned to rise from
year
Use synonyms
 to
year
Use synonyms
,accounting
20
Change preposition
for 20
show examples
million
Use synonyms
 in
year
Use synonyms
 2 and 50
million
Use synonyms
 in the
last
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
. As
of
Change preposition
per
show examples
 the pie chart,
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
exact
Change the word
exactly
show examples
 half of
Use synonyms
expenditure
Correct article usage
the expenditure
show examples
 will be spent on salaries.
Moreover
Linking Words
, less than a third of
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
 is projected to be wasted on set-up costs.
Also
Linking Words
, two similar proportions of
expenditure
Use synonyms
 will be devoted to training and office expenses,precisely a tenth each.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words costings, expenditure, year, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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