it is important for people to take risks both in their proffesional lives and their personal lives do you think the advantages of taking risks outweight the advantages

#people #risks #lives #outweight

It is believed that taking

risks

is crucial when talking about personal life and career. I do agree with

this

statement

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apply

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and think that the merits of taking

risks

outweigh its demerits and

this

essay will discuss both in detail. On the one hand, taking

risks

has some grave consequences.

Firstly

, without proper

evaulation

Correct your spelling

evaluation

in advance, one could easily face financial loss. Many people all around

world

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the world

show examples

have become bankrupt because of poor market research.

For example

, a business owner who has

insvested

Correct your spelling

invested

all his money in building up a new venture might soon lose everything.

Moreover

, taking

risks

without prior consideration

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apply

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would

also

lead to losing a stable and secure job.

Therefore

, it makes them start over, which may take many years to

compenstae

Correct your spelling

compensate

their

Change preposition

for their

show examples

loss.

On the other hand

, there are several plus points in high risk-taking ability.

To begin

with, taking calculated

risks

, especially in career-related issues, would contribute to personal growth and

developement

Correct your spelling

development

In other words

, being out of

comfort

Correct pronoun usage

our comfort

show examples

zone will in turn make us more confident, and help

learn

Correct pronoun usage

us learn

show examples

more skills in various areas. Take Warren Buffet as an example, if it were not for his incredible risk-taking

abilty

Correct your spelling

ability

, he would not be able to sign innumerable international contracts

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apply

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and be the world's

famous

Correct quantifier usage

most famous

show examples

business person

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businessperson

show examples

In addition

, it helps us to be more resilient when encountering challenging situations in life, thereby making us much stronger.

As a result

, it can be certainly said that there exist numerous advantages

Change preposition

show examples

taking

risks

. All things considered,

although

there are some negative aspects concerning taking

risks

, it would generally help us to act much better in society

due to

the factors mentioned above. So, I strongly believe that the advantages overshadow its disadvantages.

Submitted by behshad_arabzadeh on Thu Nov 16 2023

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introduction

Ensure that the introduction clearly presents the topic and your position without being overly general.

coherence

While supporting main points, make use of a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing to enhance clarity and flow.

examples

For task achievement, make certain to address all parts of the task. Provide specific examples that directly support the argument to showcase a deep understanding of the topic.

conclusion

In the conclusion, aim to synthesize your main points more effectively to ensure a strong final impression on the reader.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

opportunity
growth
innovation
achievement
comfort zone
security
failure
success
uncertainty
challenges
decision-making
courage
calculated risks
consequences
fear
regret

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it is important for people to take risks both in their proffesional lives and their personal lives do you think the advantages of taking risks outweight the advantages

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think it is more important to spend money on roads and motorways than on public transport systems such as railways and trams. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some people think reading stories in books is better than watching TV or playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

While some think family run business is the best way to run it , others think Family run business is problematic. What is your opinion.

The best way to reduce the number of traffic accidents is to raise the age limit for younger drivers and to lower the age limit for aged drivers. Do you agree ?