IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

In the future, nobody will buy printed newaspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#future #nobody #newaspapers #books
It is true that
people
 will read everything online because the technology is increasing, and it is very easy and cheap to read them online. I believe that the number of
people
 who read books and news online will growth up. I surely agree that the percentage will rise so,
this
 essay will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
this
 situation and will give reasons.
To begin
 with, the reason why many
people
 should search information online. First of all, the price is very
lower
Correct word choice
low
show examples
.
Secondly
, it is very easy to take everywhere
such
 as
people
 only pay for the internet, and they just have a smartphone
then
 they can find new data everywhere.
Submitted by itchayatop31 on

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introduction conclusion present
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. It is important to start with a statement that presents the main argument and finish with a conclusion that summarises your viewpoints.
logical structure
The logical structure of the essay is weak. It would be improved by organizing the content into clear paragraphs, each with a single idea, and by using cohesive devices to link ideas and paragraphs.
supported main points
Main points are touched upon but not fully explained or supported with specific examples. Future essays should delve deeper into each point, supporting them with more details, clear reasoning, and examples where possible.
complete response
The response to the task is incomplete. You should expand on your argument and provide a more thorough analysis of the prompt, considering both sides of the argument and concluding with your own reasoned opinion.
clear comprehensive ideas
While you have addressed the topic, your ideas need to be expressed more clearly and comprehensively. Work on explaining your viewpoint more extensively, perhaps by including a comparison with printed materials, and the implications of the trend towards digital media.
relevant specific examples
Specific examples to support your points are lacking. The use of concrete examples would strengthen the argument and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic. Consider including real-world implications or referencing studies or statistics.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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