In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

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The average weight of the community is increasing and

due to

Linking Words

fatness, they become ill. So, their level of health and fitness is decreasing. There are different reasons for these issues which I discuss in

this

Linking Words

essay.

Finally

Linking Words

, I represent other measures that could be taken to solve them.

Firstly

Linking Words

, depression has increased in societies. Some crowd are depressed

due to

Linking Words

different dilemmas including divorce, debt, love defeat, or diseases depression is a cognitive and mental problem which limits humans at home from other nations a depressed person has to take pills and sleep to forget the realities of her/his life. Lack of movement makes her/him fat as soon as possible.

Secondly

Linking Words

, machinery life has provided a comfortable living for all society. They use their cars to go shopping, to school, to university or work to get there soon. There is no time for walking or gym. Lack of physical activity results in fatness and health obstacles, especially for adults.

Thirdly

Linking Words

, fast-food restaurant advertisements inspire the community to eat pizza or sandwiches continuously which are very delicious and are full of fat and sugar which results in fatness and physical complications unfortunately.

To conclude

Linking Words

, increasing the average weight of the population which has resulted in decreasing their health and fitness levels is

due to

Linking Words

mental problems

such

Linking Words

as depression, sleeping and eating more than necessary, lack of physical movement and using unhealthy foods. I suggest inspiring folk to take part in group activities

such

Linking Words

as going to clubs, walking in the park with friends, and using healthy foods.

In addition

Linking Words

, studying psychology is very helpful for all crowds to know themselves better through psychological character tests to improve themselves by knowing their weaknesses and strong points.

nasringoli.psycolohistMon Nov 20 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay has a basic logical structure and an evident introduction and conclusion. However, the coherence could be improved significantly with clearer transitions and a stronger paragraph structure. To enhance coherence and cohesion, use a range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and across paragraphs more effectively. Additionally, ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea, supported by relevant explanations or examples.

task achievement

Concerning task achievement, the essay partially addresses the question and provides some explanation of the causes and solutions to the problem stated. However, to attain a higher score, the response needs to develop ideas more comprehensively with clear and relevant examples. Each cause and solution should be expanded upon with more detail, analysis, and supporting evidence to fully satisfy the task requirements. Besides, be careful not to stray off-topic with irrelevant information, and avoid broad generalizations by focusing on specific issues and remedies.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

286 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary
obesity
overweight
physical activity
sedentary lifestyle
exercise
unhealthy diet
fast food
urbanization
modernization
stress
awareness
education
government intervention
policies
promotion
sports
fitness programs
health education
taxation
public transportation
infrastructure
parks
recreational spaces

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In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

Some colleges encourage students to create businesses while they are still in school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the coutryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development.

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important.

Directors and managers of organization are often older people. Some people say that it is better for younger people to be leaders. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some people regard the increasing business and cultural contact between countries as a positive development. Others, however, feel that this will lead to the loss of national identities. Discuss both views and give your opinion.