More and more people are becoming seriously overweight. Some people think a solution can be to increase the price of fattening foods. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Due to
the rise of fattening food
and the lack of physical exercise, there are numerous residents becoming noticeably obese. Some people
, therefore
, suggest that the price
of fattening food
should be increased. From my point of view, I totally agree with both statements.
Overweight can lead to numerous serious diseases. The main reason why the number of people
with obesity have
been rising rapidly is consuming too much fast Change the verb form
has
food
. These days, especially in the urban area, people
tend to eat more junk food
because of its convenience, affordable price
and deliciousness. However
, food
such
as hamburgers include
a large amount of fattening and Change the verb form
includes
a
lack Correct article usage
apply
of
Change preposition
apply
fiber
and other nutrition. Change the spelling
fibre
Consequently
, this
may lead to uncontrollable weight gain. In the long term, your the
body will contract some health problems Correct article usage
apply
such
as stroke, high blood pressure and heart attacks.
To solve the issue mentioned, food
prices should be adjusted by the authorities. From my perspective, the price
of fattening foods should be raised and the price
of healthy food
such
as vegetables should be decreased by the government to reduce the number of overweight people
. Therefore
, residents may tend to prefer buying nutritional food
rather than junk food
and it may lower the overweight people
. In the long term, the government can control the number of people
who become obese.
In conclusion, more people
are becominge
remarkably obese Correct your spelling
becoming
due to
fattening from fast food
and lack of fiber
. The most effective solution can be increasing the Change the spelling
fibre
price
of fattening food
.Submitted by anhquynhkth06 on
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introduction conclusion
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are distinct and clearly stated. Your introduction should provide a clear position statement, while your conclusion should restate your views and summarise the main points of your argument.
logical structure
Develop paragraphs that progress logically with clear main ideas supported by examples or further explanation. This makes the text easier to follow and strengthens the arguments presented.
specific examples
Use specific examples to support your points. Vague statements can weaken your arguments. Providing concrete illustrations can enhance the persuasiveness and clarity of your response.
task response
Address all parts of the task clearly, showing the examiner that you have a full understanding of the topic. Ensure your response is complete and all your ideas are expanded and explained.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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