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Band 6

Some people believe that everyone has the right to receive university education, so the government should make it free to all people regardless of their financial background. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #right #university #education #government #background
Some
people
 think that all
people
 have the right to get a university
education
, so it has to be made accessible by the government for all students, regardless of their financial background. I totally agree with the statement because we can create a better life if
education
 is free.
Firstly
,
education
 is one of the most essential things which can create a better life.
In other words
, everyone needs an excellent
education
 to be professional in their jobs, so without studying, they can not help their country.
As a result
, these countries will be unable to be among the strongest nations.
Secondly
,
education
 should be free because not everyone can afford the amount of money to study.
That is
 to say, many
people
 are not able to afford their needs, and it is almost impossible for them to pay for their
education
.
For example
,
people
 who want to study at universities are supposed to pay a large amount of money depending on their majors.
Hence
, most will resort to looking for jobs and will not continue studying.
Thirdly
, when governments do not help these
people
, there will be a high percentage of
people
 who will leave their countries looking for a better quality of life.
Therefore
, the governments will lose a lot of local
people
.
To sum up
,
while
people
 may vary in their opinions, I believe that everyone must be allowed to study for free since it might be helpful for the countries to improve. Governments have to help
people
 who have limited income.
Submitted by s_syedy on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and stays focused on that idea, avoiding unnecessary deviations or repetitions.
coherence cohesion
Develop each point with more specific examples and details for a more compelling argument. Generic statements should be substantiated with tangible evidence or explanations.
task achievement
Make sure to fully address the prompt by discussing both sides of the argument or explaining the reasons behind your agreement or disagreement. This will help fulfill the task requirements effectively.
task achievement
Expand on your ideas to fully develop your arguments. This includes offering a thorough explanation and providing relevant examples that are directly linked to the core idea of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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