In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problem as a result of eating to much fast food. It is neccesary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#countries #people #health #food #neccesary #governments #tax

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Elevating

taxes

on junk

food

to alleviate health issues is an arguable debate subject, with advocating an increase as the best variant. I drastically opine that governments should take financial actions to curb these problems. The first and foremost argument is that eating too much fast

food

might open an irreversible door to deteriorating to death. Put simply, excessive consumption of junk

food

has malicious effects on our physical vitality and cognition. Several research studies have already proved that there was a link between unhealthy diet and obesity.

For instance

, Japan has eliminated fast

food

from its cuisine for 10 years

while

swapping unhealthy ones

such

as hamburgers and

tosts

Correct your spelling

toasts

costs

tests

with a balanced diet that generally consists of rice and macaroni. So, it is unavoidable to deter

people

from these types of foods by increasing

taxes

locally. Another concern is that an increasing number of fat

people

is an issue for any country because it might lead to a fragile community for the future

while

taking children who are influenced by their parents into account. To explain, a population that has 80 per cent of obese

people

can not be successful in the areas which require a fit and vigorous body. Eventually, it is unavoidable to have a cavity in these fields because of a lack of fit

people

, and

then

elevating

taxes

on foods to stay fit is a substantial choice.

To conclude

, despite concerns about

taxes

on junk

food

, alienating

people

from fast

food

to mitigate detrimental health issues is indispensable.

Submitted by yusifakhmad on Tue Nov 21 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that main ideas are clearly and logically presented throughout the essay, with each paragraph having a clear central topic that is expanded upon with supporting information.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are present but consider refining them to more precisely introduce the topic and summarize the main points with a definitive stance.

Coherence and Cohesion

Support your main points with more specific and detailed examples, references, or data to strengthen your arguments and make them more persuasive.

Task Achievement

You have addressed the question and presented a clear opinion, ensuring a complete response to the task. Continue to develop your points fully and stay on topic throughout the essay.

Task Achievement

Your ideas are clear and comprehensive. To further improve, work on connecting these ideas more seamlessly, and ensure that each paragraph adds to the overall argument of the essay.

Task Achievement

Include more relevant, specific examples to support each point. More detailed and specific examples demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic and can enhance the persuasiveness of your arguments.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

253 words

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In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problem as a result of eating to much fast food. It is neccesary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Include an introduction and conclusion

Nowadays children are consuming too many sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons for and the solutions to this situation?

Some people say that parent should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own discuss both opinions and give your opinion ?

Writing task 2 task 2 IELTS 17 Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people think that in order to deal with the problem of congestion in cities, privately owned vehicles should be banned in city centers, while others consider this to be an unrealistic solution. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

There is an idea, according to which that with more and more people using the internet and messaging, the communication in the real world will cease to exist.