Today more people are overweight than ever before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this? What are the main effects of this epidemic?
These days,the number of obese
people
is increasing significantly. In this
essay I will point out the main causes and the effects of this
phenomenon.
It could be seen that our lifestyle
is the primary cause of obesity, especially the busy lifestyle
, which makes people
more lazy . More and more people
choose fast food and instant food as it is more convenient to eat and cheap even though they have a large amount of calories , and as a result
people
become overweight. Moreover
, having a busy lifestyle
means that there is no time for people
to do exercise which makes them obese . Vietnam, for instance
, has many people
living with a tight schedule, especially in the big cities where people
spend more time on working and studying than exercising so more and more people
are overweight than they were before.
Because of this
epidemic many health
problems have appeared like heart attack and stroke which is not only the reason for many death cases but also
makes the health
services overload when the number of people
having heart attack or stroke keeps rising. Moreover
, obesity could affect our mental health
, because in some cases it is the main reason for self-deprecation and depression. It could not be denied that physical appearance plays an important role in our daily life, and as a healthy body is favorable worldwide, being overweight makes people
feel lost which causes them mental problems.
In conclusion, our lifestyle
is the main reason for obesity which leads to many other physic and mental health
problemsSubmitted by jakedth162 on
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structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction and conclusion should be distinct and reflect each other in content, summarizing the main points of the essay.
development
Develop main points with adequate support. Each body paragraph should focus on a single idea, supported by detailed examples or explanations.
connectives
Improve coherence with better transitions and logical connectors. Use phrases that clearly show how your ideas are related and sequence them appropriately within and between paragraphs.
task response
Always address the task fully. Make sure you respond to all parts of the question and provide a complete argument with relevant examples if required.
examples
Include more relevant and specific examples or data to illustrate your points. This can involve citing studies, statistics or providing concrete instances that effectively back up your claims.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite