108.Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

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It is argued that an increasing number of
individuals
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choose to
work
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for themselves, rather than
work
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for other companies.
This
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essay would argue that the main reason for
this
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is that
people
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feel more free when they are self-employed,
while
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the main drawbacks are high risk and stress. On the one hand,
people
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who have their own businesses have more liberty.
This
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is because when
individuals
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work
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for others, they need to follow rules. But if they are self-employed, they do not need to listen to what others ask them to do,
instead
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, they are the ones who tell others what they need to do.
Also
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,
people
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are more free because they can
work
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from where they want and when they want.
For example
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, normally freelancers of big companies do not go to
work
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every day, only when there is something urgent or to ensure that everything is in order,
while
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the other time, they can do other activities.
On the other hand
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, self-employed
people
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are more exhausted. The high competition in the market, makes
people
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worry about their business since they are not sure if it will succeed or not,
also
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, they need to look for solutions if there are any problems.
Furthermore
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becoming a freelancer is very risky.
This
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is because
individuals
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need to invest a large amount of money to create their businesses.
People
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can go bankrupt if the company does not
work
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well, and they lose everything they invested.
For instance
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, many
people
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who had had a successful business, fell into bankruptcy from one day to another, losing everything they had and having a large amount of debts that they needed to pay. In conclusion,
individuals
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prefer to be freelancers because they are freer,
although
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there are drawbacks
such
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as high-risk rates and
people
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being more exhausted.
Submitted by elenazheng1211 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
A more coherent logical structure could include clearer topic sentences that create a stronger framework for the paragraphs, allowing the reader to follow the argument with greater ease. Additionally, strive for smoother transitions between ideas within paragraphs as well as in the overall essay.
Task Achievement
Regarding task achievement, make sure to address all parts of the prompt fully. Provide a more balanced discussion of the reasons for self-employment and its disadvantages, ensuring that examples given are relevant and fully explained in the context of the argument. Aim to develop the main ideas further with more detailed explanation or analysis for greater clarity.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-employment
  • freelancing
  • entrepreneurship
  • autonomy
  • financial stability
  • work-life balance
  • financial insecurity
  • lack of support
  • resources
  • long working hours
  • uncertain income
  • job security
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