108.Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

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It is argued that an increasing number of

individuals

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choose to

work

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for themselves, rather than

work

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for other companies.

This

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essay would argue that the main reason for

this

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is that

people

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feel more free when they are self-employed,

while

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the main drawbacks are high risk and stress. On the one hand,

people

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who have their own businesses have more liberty.

This

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is because when

individuals

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work

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for others, they need to follow rules. But if they are self-employed, they do not need to listen to what others ask them to do,

instead

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, they are the ones who tell others what they need to do.

Also

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people

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are more free because they can

work

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from where they want and when they want.

For example

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, normally freelancers of big companies do not go to

work

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every day, only when there is something urgent or to ensure that everything is in order,

while

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the other time, they can do other activities.

On the other hand

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, self-employed

people

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are more exhausted. The high competition in the market, makes

people

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worry about their business since they are not sure if it will succeed or not,

also

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, they need to look for solutions if there are any problems.

Furthermore

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becoming a freelancer is very risky.

This

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is because

individuals

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need to invest a large amount of money to create their businesses.

People

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can go bankrupt if the company does not

work

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well, and they lose everything they invested.

For instance

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, many

people

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who had had a successful business, fell into bankruptcy from one day to another, losing everything they had and having a large amount of debts that they needed to pay. In conclusion,

individuals

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prefer to be freelancers because they are freer,

although

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there are drawbacks

such

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as high-risk rates and

people

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being more exhausted.

elenazheng1211Thu Nov 23 2023

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Coherence & Cohesion

A more coherent logical structure could include clearer topic sentences that create a stronger framework for the paragraphs, allowing the reader to follow the argument with greater ease. Additionally, strive for smoother transitions between ideas within paragraphs as well as in the overall essay.

Task Achievement

Regarding task achievement, make sure to address all parts of the prompt fully. Provide a more balanced discussion of the reasons for self-employment and its disadvantages, ensuring that examples given are relevant and fully explained in the context of the argument. Aim to develop the main ideas further with more detailed explanation or analysis for greater clarity.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

302 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

self-employment
freelancing
entrepreneurship
autonomy
financial stability
work-life balance
financial insecurity
lack of support
resources
long working hours
uncertain income
job security

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108.Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Your opinion

Art and music are considered some of the fundamental elements of all the societies. Do you think art and music still have a place in today's modern world of technology? Should children spend more time learning art and music at school?

In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents, who are choosing to educate children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?

In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many differences from their home country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reasons？Is this a positive or negative development？

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?