Some people say that the amount of noise that people make should be strictly controlled. Others say that people should be free to make as much noise as they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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As the human rights issue has arisen in the
last
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century, people are arguing about the freedom to choose their way of life.
This
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includes the amount of
noise
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they
sound
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. Some people say
this
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should be controlled,
while
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others argue
this
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. For some reason, I stand with the idea of giving some limitations to performing a loud
noise
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.
To begin
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with, the main reason to control the volume level is to have comfortable surroundings. Albeit giving human rights, performing a high
noise
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is
also
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disturbing others' right to have comfortable surroundings at the same time. With a high-frequency
sound
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in their surrounding, they might not be able to do their activity. As an illustration, if a concert is held near a school at the school time
then
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the students might not be able to study at the school. In another perspective, strictly controlling the level of
noise
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may cause problems for some activities,
such
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as in aviation and festivals. It is impossible for some companies to decrease the
noise
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.
For example
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, making a loud
sound
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when a plane is taking off or landing is inevitable.
Thus
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, the companies may spend higher expenditures in order to adapt to
such
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a rule. As an alternative to measure
this
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problem, there are some limitations that can be implemented by the government. The first limitation is by ruling the companies to make
noise
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in a certain area.
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, airports should be in a suburban with a large empty area and should not be near residential areas.
Secondly
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, events that possibly cause a loud
noise
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should be banned during a certain time.
For example
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, outdoor parties should not be held after 10pm in order to have a peaceful neighbourhood. In summary, despite giving people the freedom to act, making a loud
sound
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should be limited. On one hand,
this
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is inevitable to cause a high volume in some fields.
On the other hand
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, it may disturb others' comfort.
Thus
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, some limitations are needed to give a peaceful life for both parties.

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Task Achievement
Be sure to fully develop your main points with more detailed examples or evidence. While your essay does include examples, they could be expanded to further strengthen your arguments.
Task Achievement
Work on providing more specific examples that are directly relevant to the topic. Though the examples given are good, providing more detailed scenarios or statistics could enhance your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a logical structure overall, but consider using more varied transitional phrases to smoothly guide the reader from one idea to the next. This will enhance the flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion. Your essay does this well, summarizing the key points; however, revisiting your thesis in the conclusion to make your position even clearer might strengthen your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • sound pollution
  • auditory health
  • noise ordinances
  • public tranquility
  • vulnerable populations
  • excessive noise pollution
  • individual freedoms
  • personal expression
  • community life
  • public order
  • individual rights
  • designated noise zones
  • time restrictions
  • soundproofing
  • noise barriers
  • quiet hours
  • high-energy environments
  • technology and innovation
  • respectful coexistence
  • compromise
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