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Band 7.5

You recently booked a part-time course at a college. you now need to cancel your booking. Write a letter to the college administrator. In your letter - say which part-time course you booked - explain why you need to cancel your booking - ask about booking a different course

#course #college #administrator
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to lodge a formal request to cancel my newly-booked course. I took the modern history program conducted by Professor Snape two weeks ago. Everything went fine, but recently, I have
finally
 managed to find a job in a local store. Unfortunately, my current bursary is pretty low, and I have to work to make ends meet. I had tried to talk with my supervisor in the store before writing to you, but he said it is almost impossible to reschedule my shifts in the first six months. I found a suitable program for my diploma as a replacement for the modern history one, and I would like to ask you about booking a new course. The Сhinese history lectures start two hours earlier, and I will be able to visit them without passing. Thank you so much for your attention and participation. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Adam Smith Student ID number: 97468736
Submitted by 8453525 on

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task achievement
Ensure that your letter has a strong opening and clear purpose from the beginning. While your letter mentions the necessity of cancellation due to employment, this could have been established more clearly in the first paragraph as the primary reason for writing.
coherence and cohesion
Consider improving the structure of the paragraphs to create a seamless flow from one idea to the next. Each paragraph should build upon the previous one, guiding the reader through your request, explanation, and subsequent question regarding a new course. This will improve the logical presentation of your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
In formal correspondence, make sure each paragraph contains a single idea or request. Efficiently separate thoughts for clarity. The paragraph about seeking a new course could be expanded to clearly articulate this as a focused point within the letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Part-time course
  • Cancellation
  • Booking
  • Administrator
  • Financial situation
  • Work commitments
  • Health issues
  • Inconvenience
  • Transfer
  • Subject area
  • Schedule
  • Format
  • Cancellation policy
  • Refund process
  • Assistance
  • Understanding
What to do next:
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