Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

There are two different opinions about sharing messages in scientific research, the field and the academic world. In
this
essay, I discuss both these views and represent my viewpoint too. On the one hand, some crowd opine that awareness is for everyone who lives in the world to use it.
Therefore
, media is a way of reflecting the results of research works to inform the public.
For example
, all scientific papers are published on websites
such
as Google Scholar. all of the students can refer there and download their favourite paper to study and use for research. Science development is done in
this
way.
Besides
, trade education is vital for businessmen.
For example
, the rules of work are changed sometimes. Businessmen's awareness of these new rules is significant. Unless a businessman knows new work info, he loses his profits.
On the other hand
, instruction has been gained by the investment of universities and institutions.
Therefore
, access to new science is valuable. society should pay money to access new learning.
For example
, a businessman who imports goods to Germany should know new field advice about Germany too. In spite of the high expenses of consultation with experts, the trader has to pay expenses for new instruction. Knowing new investment opportunities provides high profits for investors.
To sum up
, I believe philosophy and tip is valuable.
Besides
, sharing new info is necessary.
Hence
, the public should pay money to be informed about their favourite issues.
Submitted by nasringoli.psycolohist on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
In your essay, ensure that you are elaborating sufficiently on each point. While you have touched upon reasons and examples, they require further development and detail to enhance task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Work on the structure of your writing. It should have a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Ideas should be organized and presented in a logical manner to improve coherence.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your paragraphs are balanced. Each main point should be well-supported with examples or explanations. Vague statements should be avoided and replaced with specific information to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices to connect ideas and paragraphs together. The essay currently shows some attempts at using linking words but could benefit from a more varied and accurate use.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
What to do next:
Look at other essays: