in some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss some of the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this
In many countries around the world,
students
are often encouraged to take a school break, Use synonyms
such
as Linking Words
traveling
or engaging in part-time work, before continuing their Change the spelling
travelling
university
Use synonyms
studies
. In Use synonyms
this
essay, I will discuss both views regarding the advantages and disadvantages of Linking Words
students
taking a school break before pursuing higher education.
Use synonyms
To begin
, educational authorities have established breaks for Linking Words
students
, aiming to allow them to release stress accumulated during their Use synonyms
studies
. Use synonyms
Therefore
, it may be beneficial for Linking Words
students
to maintain a spirited approach to Use synonyms
university
life. Taking part-time Use synonyms
jobs
or Use synonyms
traveling
with friends are among the activities Change the spelling
travelling
students
can pursue during Use synonyms
this
break, significantly reducing stress and enhancing their work-related experiences. Linking Words
Consequently
, Linking Words
students
may approach their Use synonyms
university
Use synonyms
studies
with renewed passion.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, there are some disadvantages to encouraging Linking Words
students
to travel or take part-time Use synonyms
jobs
. Use synonyms
For example
, in Indonesia, some Linking Words
students
may be tempted to postpone their Use synonyms
university
Use synonyms
studies
after earning some income. Use synonyms
This
delay could be influenced by the allure of receiving a salary through employment. In Linking Words
such
cases, parents play a crucial role in guiding Linking Words
students
to ensure they balance work and educational commitments. Use synonyms
Additionally
, most part-time Linking Words
jobs
offer lower salaries compared to the potential earnings after completing a 3-4 year Use synonyms
university
program.
In summary, taking a break or engaging in part-time work after completing school can help alleviate student stress accumulated over the years of study. Use synonyms
However
, Linking Words
students
need to be mindful of time limits when pursuing part-time Use synonyms
jobs
, as these roles may offer only monthly salaries.Use synonyms
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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure that your essay follows a clear logical structure. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, and subsequent sentences should support that idea. Transitions between paragraphs and ideas should be smooth and logical, guiding the reader through your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, indicating an awareness of essay structure, which is positive. However, the conclusion needs to reiterate the key points more clearly and provide a final, decisive opinion on the matter.
Coherence & Cohesion
Support your main points with more developed explanations and relevant examples. The use of specific details will strengthen your arguments and make them more compelling to the reader.
Task Achievement
Ensure that your response fully addresses all parts of the task. The essay should discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of the gap year in equal measure. Present your ideas with clarity and depth.
Task Achievement
Develop your ideas comprehensively with a clear explanation of how they are relevant to the topic. Avoid repeating ideas and instead delve deeper into each concept to demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.
Task Achievement
Include relevant and specific examples to support your ideas. Examples should be concrete and directly relate to the points you are making, rather than being generic or vague.