IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Living standards are often better in cities than in the countryside, which causes problems. What are some of the differences and problems? What steps could be taken to reduced them?

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Correct your spelling
It
 is generally believed that
cities
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 often have better living
standards
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 than
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countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
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;
however
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, the trend itself creates issues.
This
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 essay will discuss the causes of it and provide possible solutions. The disparity in living
standards
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 between
cities
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 and the
countryside
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 can be attributed to factors
such
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 as differences in public infrastructure and job opportunities. Rural
areas
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 often lack essential facilities like hospitals, schools, and supermarkets.
Additionally
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, the limited job opportunities in the
countryside
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results
Correct subject-verb agreement
result
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 in the migration of young people to
cities
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, leaving the elderly population behind.
This
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 creates a vicious cycle of dependency on the elderly population for support,
as well as
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 making
cities
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 overcrowded. Improving the availability and accessibility of
transportation
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 is essential in reducing the gap in living
standards
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 between urban and rural
areas
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. When
transportation
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 is convenient for individuals and businesses, the disparity in living
standards
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 is likely to diminish. For business, the cost of operating a business in the
countryside
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 is typically lower than in urban
areas
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.
Additionally
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, owing to
efficiency
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the efficiency
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 of
transportation
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, there is no need to afraid of losing connection to the city. At the same time, improving access to
transportation
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 increases the likelihood of individuals choosing to reside in cheaper
countryside
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areas
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due to
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 easier access to the city. With adequate
transportation
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 options, the decision between city and
countryside
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 living may not be a significant concern,
thus
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 helping to alleviate the issue. In conclusion, the variation in living
standards
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 between
cities
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 and the
countryside
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 is largely
due to
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 differences in infrastructure and job opportunities, improvements in
transportation
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 by the government could lead to a progressive reduction in the gap.

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structure
Keep maintaining a clear structure in your essays with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This makes your argument easier to follow.
coherence
Use a variety of conjunctions to ensure paragraphs and sentences are well-connected. This enhances the coherence of your essay.
examples
Provide clear examples to support your main points. This strengthens your argument and makes your essay more convincing.
task response
The essay effectively addresses the prompt, discussing both causes and solutions to the identified issue.
structure
You have clearly delineated paragraphs, which aids the reader in following the flow of your argument.
language use
Your essay shows a good range of vocabulary related to the topic, contributing to a comprehensive exploration of the issue.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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