Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self- employed?

Currently, lots of people select to struggle for themselves. So, they avoid working for a factory or a company. There are different reasons for free work. In
this
essay, I discuss the causes of
this
performance.
Next,
I discuss the disadvantages of being self-employed. To start with, a person who is self-employed has flexible time for struggle. For symbol, my brother is a translator who works at night because he concentrates on his production better at night.
Secondly
, there is no bully boss at production who asks employees to endeavour in a bad situation.
Therefore
, the effort situation is not compulsory. For illustration, my friend left his trial
due to
the hot weather and the dark and dirty place of his job. Another friend of mine left her task
due to
a lack of effort and safety.
Thirdly
, a self-employed person is sure about earning his/her income on time.
On the contrary
, a person who works for another company or organization has to accept a delay in payment. For case, Mary was a friend who could not afford the tuition fee of her college
due to
a delay in her wage.
Finally
, I discuss the drawbacks of a freelance job. Paying a high amount of tax, acceptance of different responsibilities at performance as boss for making all decisions, and paying rental expenses or charges are some of the disadvantages of the working for market. For pattern, my uncle established a company to produce in the food industry. He employed 40 employees. So, he had to pay wages and insurance for all 40 employees monthly. As the economic situation of the market was awful, he lost his money at the endeavour.
To sum up
, self-working provides both advantages and disadvantages. People are free to choose between them. Accepting responsibility or avoiding responsibility plays a key role in their selection. I suggest people know themselves more to choose one of them which is suitable for them.
Submitted by nasringoli.psycolohist on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The response partially addresses the prompt, but the ideas are not fully developed, and the question about why many people choose to be self-employed is not addressed in sufficient depth. The disadvantages are mentioned, but specific examples are lacking, and further elaboration on these disadvantages is needed to enhance the task response.
coherence cohesion
There are instances of repetition and lack of variety in linking words which affects the logical flow of ideas. Cohesion could be improved by using a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing structure. Additionally, there is a need for better topic sentence formulation to guide the reader more effectively through the arguments.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion is present but it is quite generic. A more impactful conclusion that summarizes the key points discussed would greatly enhance the overall essay. It is essential to directly restate how the body content has addressed the essay prompts, offering a concise summing up of the arguments made.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: