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Band 6

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

#countries #people #history #house #research
Due to
 different reasons , some people try to research the history of the house or building they live in. In
this
 essay , some of these factors were mentioned.
Then
, the method of gathering data was discussed. First of all, knowing about the safety and security of the nearness is important for a person who is going to live there. A building with criminal residences provides danger for other bystanders including money robbery or jewellery stealing.
therefore
, residents have the right to know about the history of other acquaintances to prevent future incidents.
Secondly
, neighbours' social communication level is considered an important factor in a building or adjacency because it provides the basis for suitable cooperation and esteem to obey social rules which prevents many problems.
Thirdly
, the facilities of some buildings are so much that require a lot of time to handle them and waste a lot of money to fix them.
Therefore
, it is not beneficial to live in
such
 a building.
For example
, the procrastination of our neighbours in paying gas fees led to a large amount of debt to the gas office which resulted in problems.
Overall
, ensuring of security and safety of the neighbourhood, suitable social communication among neighbours and suitable facilities basis are three significant reasons that inspire new residents to search for the building they are going to live there that seems rational. acquaintance and supermarkets are suitable references for gathering data about new places to live in.
Submitted by nasringoli.psycolohist on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader through your argument effectively. Your essay lacks clear topic sentences for each main point.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of cohesive devices and discourse markers to link ideas within and across sentences and paragraphs. More cohesive devices are needed to better structure the essay.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion need to be more distinguishable and clear, clearly indicating the essay's argument and summarising the main points at the end.
task achievement
Each paragraph should explore a clear main idea or aspect of the question. Your essay should remain focused on the reasons for and methods of researching the history of a home or building.
task achievement
Ensure that all parts of the prompt are addressed comprehensively. The second part of the question, "How can people research this?", has not been adequately answered.
task achievement
Use specific examples to support your arguments. Your essay could be improved by including more detailed and relevant examples.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Historical research
  • Genealogy
  • Architectural styles
  • Heritage
  • Relics
  • Oral history
  • Archival records
  • Museum exhibits
  • Historical societies
  • House tours
  • Renovation projects
  • Original blueprints
  • Careful documentation
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