Some people think that money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What other factors contribute towards happiness?

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A high bank balance is considered to play a predominant role in the well-being of an individual. In my opinion, it is possible for people to be happy even if they have little money as internal satisfaction matters the most.

However

Linking Words

, factors

such

Linking Words

as spending time with loved ones contribute to a joyful

life

Use synonyms

. The primary factor that brings cheers to living without much savings is internal peace. If a

person

Use synonyms

is sad from some thoughts no matter how much funds he has, delight cannot be seen on his face. The joy of seeing the face of a dear or the pleasure received by doing selfless service is beyond words.

Moreover

Linking Words

, it is rightly believed that more notes bring more tension as

then

Linking Words

the

person

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would have fear of losing it and eventually, it would lead to the deprecation of his sleep. The fact that a doctor doing volunteer work in an underdeveloped place may have fewer bills in their pocket but the reward of helping people and doing the job they are good at brings them happiness and they feel like at least they are able to help someone.

Although

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having money helps to fulfill all the demands

nevertheless

Linking Words

the peace of mind

as well as

Linking Words

heart one gets, after spending time with the

person

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they love is out of

this

Linking Words

world. Joy can be brought to

life

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after a deep talk with the special being.

Additionally

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, if there is no one in

life

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to talk to, a

person

Use synonyms

feels depressed and lonely.

Thus

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, the presence of a special character makes a huge impact on

life

Use synonyms

as an individual may have a lot of resources or good cash flow but these things contribute to only external happiness not internal. The research by the mental hospital in Amritsar showed that folks usually suffer from schizophrenia or anxiety simply because they never poured their heart out which eventually leads to an unhappy standard of living.

To conclude

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, undoubtedly masses can be happy with fewer funds as peace is required to have an enjoyable day.

The factor

Correct article usage

Factor

show examples

such

Linking Words

as spending some quality time with our favourite

person

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makes

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

cherish.

pkaur3443Thu Nov 30 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea for stronger coherence. Avoid mixing multiple points in one paragraph.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical flow by using a wider range of linking words and phrases to better connect paragraphs and sentences.

coherence cohesion

Begin with a clear introduction that directly responds to the task question, and end with a conclusion that summarizes your main points effectively.

task achievement

Fully address all parts of the task to ensure a complete response. Expand on your ideas and provide more detailed explanations, supported by relevant examples.

task achievement

Strive to express your ideas more clearly and comprehensively. This requires both a strong command of language and a clear understanding of the essay topic.

task achievement

Provide more relevant and specific examples to support main points. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

358 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Promoting happiness
Essential factors
Financial stability
Material wealth
Personal fulfillment
Contentment
Basic needs
Maslow's hierarchy of needs
Social connections
Pursuing passions
Well-being
Mental health
Spiritual practices
Personal growth
Community service
Societal contribution
Philanthropy
Joy
Satisfaction
Prosperity

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Some people think that money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What other factors contribute towards happiness?

Many people think that libraries are essential for society. Others, however, disagree and say that it is more practical to access information on computers, while libraries are a waste of money and resources. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

An increasing number of people are choosing to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. Why do people have operations to change the way they look? Do you think this is a positive or negative change?

you recently organised an all day meeting for your company, which look place in a local hotel. In their feedback, participants at the meeting said that they liked the hotel, but they were unhppy about the food that was served for lunch. write a letter to the manger of the hotel.

In mant countries are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion