Some people think that success is the best measure for intelligence, while others think that intelligence can be measured in other ways. What is your opinion?
The
level
of someone’s intelligence
is not only proven by success. There are other factors that may not agree with this
statement. One contribution to measuring intelligence
is seeking general knowledge
, while
another fact that can be added, is the aspect of emotional intelligence
.
Pursuing general, wisdom or knowledge
is a distinguished trait of proving an individual’s level
of intelligence
. Open-minded and smart people
, often search of
new ways to expand their ways of thinking, and are rarely satisfied with an unprogressive state of mind. The meaning behind general Change preposition
for
knowledge
has the
key features, which are curiosity and the desire to learn not only about different cultures or traditionsCorrect article usage
apply
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
bringing
awareness Wrong verb form
bring
into
them. Provided with that information, acknowledging those characteristics in an intelligent mind can be instantly spotted just by engaging .
Possessing Change preposition
to
an
emotional Correct article usage
apply
intelligence
is also
a huge sign of someone’s level
of smartness humans as a society are not top-notch empaths or emotionally oriented, and the
humankind Correct article usage
apply
lack
awareness of Change the verb form
lacks
peoples
feelings and can turn egotistical. Recognizing Change noun form
people's
people
emotions is not an easy job, being able to react to them correctly, without being primary or defensive is a hard and calculated task. Change noun form
people's
For example
, plenty of successful leaders, or CEOs do not possess the most important thing in society, which is in fact, empathy.
In conclusion, while
some Correct word choice
apply
people
may argue that successful people
do not need to have general wisdom, curiosity for knowledge
or the capability of an emotional intellect. I hold the opinion, that in order to measure someone’s level
of intelligence
, you need to have at least one of those traits to be considered well-read.Submitted by kiarayulisivova on
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coherence cohesion
While you have provided an introduction and conclusion, they lack a clear thesis statement and a definitive summary of your arguments, respectively. For a higher grade, ensure your introduction clearly states your viewpoint and your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points made in the essay, reinforcing your opinion.
coherence cohesion
The main points of your essay are understandable but are not thoroughly developed or supported by concrete examples or evidence. To improve, make sure each paragraph elaborates on a single idea, provides detailed support, and uses specific examples to demonstrate your claims.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic, but the response is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth in the development of ideas. To achieve a higher score, provide a more nuanced discussion, include varied examples, and present a comprehensive analysis of the topic that clearly delineates your position on the measure of intelligence.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.