The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by providing at least six years of free education for each child, so that all children can read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#poverty #countries #six #years #education #child #children #numbers

It is commonly implied that guaranteeing primary school

education

remains free would augment access to

education

. Some have proposed that

this

would be a particularly

effectual

Replace the word

effective

show examples

solution to

poverty

. I completely agree with

this

suggestion and in the subsequent paragraphs, I will delineate why the assured provision of free primary

education

will alleviate

poverty

Firstly

, financial constraints deter several students from continuing their

education

Therefore

, making the government sponsor elementary schooling would assist in curtailing the school drop-out rates. It would

also

provide a solution to child labour and delinquency.

Furthermore

, research shows that developing countries suffer from alarming rates of unemployment. So, providing free primary

education

could not only empower the students to get better jobs but

also

open up several job opportunities in the

education

sector, thereby reducing joblessness.

Secondly

, providing schooling would enable individuals to acquire skills and training they would not

otherwise

receive.

This

would later help them gain better jobs and become efficacious, well-rounded citizens of the country. Providing free

education

would help individuals have a more promising outlook on their future and promote a positive attitude towards society.

This

would

also

encourage them to work towards reducing social problems

such

poverty

. Access to

education

also

provides the assurance of an economically secure future, which would

also

eliminate

poverty

However

, one could disagree with the aforementioned points stating that there would be a considerable increase in taxation to provide free

education

to all, which may add to

poverty

rather than solve it.

Additionally

, schools might be overcrowded, which would affect the quality of

education

thus

further

impacting the students’ job prospects.

Finally

, the provision of free

education

with only limited jobs may only increase competition and job insecurity, adding to deprivation. In conclusion, I believe that providing free elementary

education

free of charge can offer a long-term solution to developing economies because it may abate the problem of relinquishing their chance at a better future

while

also

aiding children to hone and acquire a range of new skills and abilities.

Submitted by phuongdong.nguyentran on Sat Dec 02 2023

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Task Achievement

Your essay exhibits a clear position throughout, aligning well with the requirements of the task. You've sufficiently developed your main points, though your arguments could be more compelling with the introduction of more specific examples and data.

Coherence & Cohesion

You have organized your essay logically, with a clear introduction and conclusion. Your ideas progress in a coherent manner, although, to enhance cohesion further, you can make use of a wider range of linking words and phrases to better signal the connections between ideas.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

336 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

literacy
numeracy
economic growth
skilled workforce
investment
employment opportunities
break the cycle of poverty
informed decisions
healthcare
infrastructure
access to technology
stable governance
challenges
cultural barriers
free education

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The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by providing at least six years of free education for each child, so that all children can read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some think that people should not change their jobs while others think they should because it brings advantages for themselves, company and society. Discuss and give opinion

In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue can be solved?

In some countries children take up paid jobs during the summer vacation. Some people feel that this amounts to child labour. Others argue that summer jobs help children learn valuable lessons. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

the procees show cocoa beans and chocolATE MAKING DIAGRAMM