Question: some people think it is better for children if the whole families ( e.g aunts , uncles and grandparents ) are involved in the children's upbringing , rather than their fathers and mothers only. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people believe that children should be raised not only by their

parents

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but

also

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with the help of their extended family,

such

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as grandparents, aunts and uncles. I mostly agree with

this

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idea because relatives can offer support and experience,

although

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there are

also

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some disadvantages. On the one hand, having the whole family involved in bringing up a

child

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can be very helpful.

First,

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grandparents often have more experience and can give useful advice to young

parents

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For example

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, they may know how to deal with common childhood problems because they raised their own children many years ago.

In addition

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, relatives can give emotional and practical support. When both

parents

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are busy working, aunts or uncles can look after the

child

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, which makes family life easier.

On the other hand

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, too many people giving opinions about how to raise a

child

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can cause confusion. Each family member may have a different idea about discipline, education or daily routines.

As a result

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, the

child

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might receive mixed messages and may not understand what is expected of them.

Furthermore

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parents

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may feel pressure or lose confidence if others interfere too much in their decisions. In conclusion,

while

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the support of extended family members can make childcare easier and provide valuable guidance, it is important that

parents

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remain the main decision-makers.

Therefore

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, I partly agree with the idea, but I believe the involvement of relatives should not be excessive.

gibratzumagul

Nov 26, 2025

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content

Keep one clear view in the end. Say your full view and stick with it in the body and the end.

content

Add one more or clear example for each idea to back up your point.

structure

Use more linking words to show how ideas go to each other and to keep the flow.

structure

Clear plan with an intro, three parts, and a short end.

cohesion

Good use of 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' to show compare

content

The idea that relatives bring help and know more about child care is well shown.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

238 words

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Question: some people think it is better for children if the whole families ( e.g aunts , uncles and grandparents ) are involved in the children's upbringing , rather than their fathers and mothers only. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some scientists think it is very soon that computers will be more intelligent than human. Some people think it is a positive development, while others think it is a negative development. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many teenagers today own a smartphone. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Some people believe that companies should manufacture products that last for a long time. Others feel that the emphasis should be placed on producing goods that are cheap. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.