Some people say that advertising is extremely succesfull at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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There have been conflicting views regarding the effects of advertising for a long time. Whilst some

people

Use synonyms

think that we are not affected by advertisements anymore because of their prevalence, others think that it is a highly effective method to make us buy things which I

also

Linking Words

definitely agree with.

This

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essay will discuss both sides. Today, advertising content is everywhere. On the roads, in our social media accounts

such

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as Instagram and YouTube, TV and all around internet-accessible platforms. It is so common that

people

Use synonyms

start thinking

Correct word choice

that

show examples

we are not affected by it anymore. Because they got so bored with the content’s similarity and seeing them everywhere, they feel like advertisements lost their

appealness

Correct your spelling

appeal

For instance

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, when I first started using Instagram there were a lot of influencers trying to

pursue

Verb problem

persuade

show examples

us to buy goods.

Due to

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

situation, I stopped following these

people

Use synonyms

and believed that I would no longer buy what they offered.

However

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, even though we think that we are not affected, our subconscious takes all their messages. With today’s advanced knowledge of psychology, we do not even realize what the advertisement is. There are lots of strategies many companies use for a long time

such

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as neuromarketing.

For instance

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, Camel, the cigarette brand, made agreements with lots of pubs, cafes and restaurants to put a camel symbol on their tables in order to create familiarity

while

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people

Use synonyms

decide which smoking brand are they gonna buy. With

this

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strategy, their profit went up 35% per year. In conclusion, whilst some

people

Use synonyms

believe advertisements are so common that we

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

no longer affect them, others believe that they are so successful in making us buy things. In my opinion,

although

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we reject it, we are still under their influence with their unknown methods.

Submitted by asik.melliss on Sun Dec 03 2023

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coherence cohesion

To enhance the essay's coherence and cohesion, aim to improve the logical structure by organizing ideas more systematically from paragraph to paragraph, ensuring clear connections and transitions. It's also beneficial to include a more varied range of cohesive devices beyond just simple connectors.

task achievement

The essay addresses the task and presents a complete response with a clear personal opinion. Enhance task achievement by developing ideas more thoroughly, expanding on the analysis, and reflecting on both views equally, providing supporting examples for each.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

297 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

persuasive
consumer behavior
brand awareness
emotional appeal
targeted advertising
social media platforms
ad fatigue
desensitized
ad-blockers
overexposure
brand loyalty
repetitive
irrelevant
personalized advertising
influencer marketing
interactive ads

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Some people say that advertising is extremely succesfull at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people think that books should be stopped in schools and that, videos, films and computers should be used instead. To what extent do you agree?

Nowadays young people spend too much of their free time in shopping malls. Some people fear that this may have negative effects on young people and the society they live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that uniform should be made compulsory part of the workplace, some disagree, discuss both view and give your opinion.

Some people think that children should only read academic book. Other believe that reading books for pleasure is equally important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Youth crime is increasing rapidly in many countries. Why it is increasing? and what solution can be taken to resolve the problem.