IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passenger. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

#future #cars #buses #trucks #driverless #people #vehicles #passenger
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In the future,
driverless
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vehicles
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 will be fulfilled and only passengers will sit in these
vehicles
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. In
this
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 essay, I argue that the benefits of
this
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 future trend outweigh the drawbacks in terms of safety and convenience aspects. One primary reason is that
driverless
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vehicles
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 may improve the problems of safety.
This
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 ensures that people can avoid some traffic accidents, especially from humans leading to.
For instance
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, much traffic research indicates that accounting for ninety per cent of car accidents come from humans.
Furthermore
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, drivers usually need to face
such
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 as climate change, physical and mental problems and other unpredictable factors. These potential risks are another factor that causes
this
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 significant accident percentage.
However
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, with automatic drivers
such
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 as artificial intelligence
systems
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, these difficulties can be addressed radically because Al
systems
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 do not deal with these challenges. Another crucial reason is that
driverless
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 cars can help people become more convenient during their travels or commuting.
This
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 is because automatic
systems
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 provide powerful calculated functions, instantaneously establishing the most efficient routes.
Additionally
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, with AI drivers, passengers can pay more attention to other options,
such
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 as work, family, and other daily items, thereby enhancing their physical and mental development.
Although
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 these automatic
systems
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 can indeed improve the lives of humanity, still some people argue that they are not 100 % able to prevent car accidents or create suitable routes. Indeed, there still are many functions that need to be improved and sometimes cannot regulate the precise routes, Google Maps is a typical example.
However
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, believing in shortly, these issues can be thoroughly solved.
To sum up
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,
driverless
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vehicles
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 can indeed present many benefits, particularly in convenience and the problems of safety.
While
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 there are still some technical aspects that need to be overcome, I firmly believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by daniellin0717 on

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task achievement
Your argument is well-developed with a clear thesis statement. However, try to use more comprehensive examples to support your points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a smooth flow of ideas by addressing minor grammatical issues and improving sentence transitions.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear position on the topic and maintains it throughout.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and well-defined, encapsulating the main arguments of the essay effectively.
coherence cohesion
The essay logically organizes ideas into paragraphs, making it easy to follow your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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