In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you thing it is a positive or negative situation?

Ownership of a house is a lot more preferred by individuals in some

countries

Use synonyms

. In these

countries

Use synonyms

people

Use synonyms

may prefer owning a

home

Use synonyms

because of the high rents and irregular incomes. And, I believe

this

Linking Words

is a positive situation in terms of residents. To commence with, owning a

home

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might have significant importance for some

people

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because of the high rents

as a result

Linking Words

inflation

Use synonyms

in that country.

For instance

Linking Words

Turkey

Use synonyms

, which is a country that still suffers from the economic instability caused by

COVID-19

Correct article usage

the COVID-19

show examples

pandemic in 2019, has announced its 2023

inflation

Use synonyms

rate which is above %400. So, rent prices in big cities climbed up to ten thousand Turkish liras which is akin to the average salary.

As a result

Linking Words

, having your own house might be important for

people

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countries

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with high

inflation

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rates. Even if the

inflation

Use synonyms

rate increases

people

Use synonyms

can still want to own a house. And,

Turkey

Use synonyms

can benefit from

this

Linking Words

situation. As the demand for homes increases, the money circulation increases and results in a better economy.

Besides

Linking Words

, in

countries

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like Malaysia, most of the

people

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have irregular incomes. For those

people

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, adjusting money for rent may not same every month. So, to not carry the stress of

this

Linking Words

on their shoulders,

people

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can dream of their own

home

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and

this

Linking Words

might be a considerable thing.

To sum up

Linking Words

, owning a

home

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might have real significance for

people

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in coe

countries

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Turkey

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or Malaysia.

People

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may dream

owning

Change preposition

of owning

show examples

home

Use synonyms

because they may not spend most of their salaries on high rents, which

Turkey

Use synonyms

sets an example

as a result

Linking Words

of the high

inflation

Use synonyms

rate, or they may have irregular incomes and may face difficulties in terms of adjusting the necessary money for the rent.

oyku.bilgin12

Dec 4, 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that there is a clear overall progression to your essay. Your ideas sometimes jump abruptly without clear connections which can confuse the reader.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction should clearly state your position regarding the topic, and it should include a brief outline of the main points to be discussed in the essay.

coherence cohesion

Support main points with more detailed examples and explanations. You touched on specifics such as Turkey's inflation and the challenges in Malaysia but more elaboration would make your points stronger.

task achievement

Your essay should fully address all parts of the task. The second part of the question regarding whether owning a home is positive or negative was not covered comprehensively.

task achievement

Strive for a clear and a comprehensive presentation of ideas. While you mention some reasons for the importance of home ownership, you could expand on this and link it more directly to the implications for individuals and the wider society, thus ensuring a more thorough exploration of the topic.

task achievement

Provide relevant examples to back up each point you make. The examples you used were good, but you need to develop them more fully to show how they support your argument.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

ownership
renting
importance
sense of security
stability
financial investment
asset
customize
decorate
belonging
community
potential
future generations
long-term
cost advantage
control
living space

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In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you thing it is a positive or negative situation?

The harms of smoking are well know, but people do the same habits. Discuss and argue the points of this topic, give your own opinion from your experiences.

In many developing countries, there is an increasing movement of workers from rural areas into cities. Why do you think this happen? What problems can this cause.

In order to change their appearance people often turn to plastic surgery. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such an approach ?

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2.Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?