Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

With the rapid development of
technology
, medicine, agriculture etc. , some
people
think that relative knowledge and research should be shared freely and exchanged as much as possible. It is obviously important to share freely valuable information especially those that are relative to the destiny of all human beings, but the scientists, companies and individuals who contribute to scientific innovation need to ensure their life quality and keep the invention motivated by economic support. The following essay will give an explanation of my view. On the one hand,
although
, the development of scientific
technology
seems to provide humans with a higher quality of life condition, in some developing countries, there are still a majority of
people
suffering from poverty because of the lack of new
technology
to enhance their production efficiency and basic living conditions.
For instance
,
people
in Africa, can not protect themselves from certain horrible diseases
such
as malaria.
Thus
, some developed countries are sharing their resources in sanitary and medical sciences fields for free.
Moreover
, because of the worsening climate change which is related directly to all
people
in the world, every expert, institute and individual should dedicate
to
Correct pronoun usage
themselves to
show examples
eco-protecting activities and share invaluable
technology
and data with all
people
, so that we can cooperate to address the issue
Correct word choice
and
show examples
protect our beautiful planet together.
On the other hand
, those professionals who are working on doing a lot of inventions in high-tech fields
such
as artificial intelligence and automatic motor-designing
according to
some aspects of business motivation, if those techniques are all shared freely, I believe the inventors are likely to lose their enthusiasm to innovate new
technology
due to
the declining of profits. In conclusion, I think those technologies that are related to human beings' fate should be shared freely and those are just the additional conditions to our life could be exchanged for profitable requirements.
Submitted by odongua on

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introduction conclusion present
Ensure your introduction clearly presents the topic and previews the main points you intend to discuss. Your introduction currently lacks a clear statement of your personal stance on the issue, which should be provided to guide the reader.
logical structure
Your essay's structure should include clear and distinct paragraphs, each beginning with a topic sentence that directly links to the question and outlining what the paragraph will discuss. Aim to include this in your essay construction.
supported main points
Your main points should be supported with relevant examples or evidence. While you did include some examples, make sure that each point you make has at least one example that directly illustrates or supports that point.
complete response
Ensure you fully address all parts of the task, clearly discussing both views and providing your own opinion. While you presented both sides, your own opinion needs to be stated more clearly throughout the essay and not only in the conclusion.
clear comprehensive ideas
Work on presenting your ideas more clearly and comprehensively. While you have made a reasonable attempt, strive to articulate the points with greater clarity and depth to enhance understanding.
relevant specific examples
Use specific examples to substantiate your arguments. The examples provided are relevant but somewhat general. Offering precise, detailed examples will strengthen your arguments and better illustrate your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
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