Governments give a lot of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been used elsewhere.   Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Artists are gained with lots of government assistance.
While
some argue that it is a loss of money because they could be sent to different spheres, I believe that representatives of the
art
world should be supported financially in terms of national culture development as a whole. On the one hand, spending the government budget
to
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on
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other departments is more valuable for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society. Ensuring the security of the
state
is considered to be a vital authority mission for the citizens through the establishment and investment of special sections like army force, military weapons
and
Correct word choice
apply
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etc.
For instance
, numerous developed countries
due to
imperialistic mindset tend to spend a huge amount of taxpayers’ money on military weapons to be able to protect their territory.
However
, I believe that the historical value created by living artists is more important for national integrity through cultural association.
On the other hand
, it is thought that the
state
should help the artist’s life, thanks to the financial support providing him the ability to create for national heritage. Most of the time creators start their professional path with no recognition and glory,
therefore
they have to figure out financial issues and at the same time continue to produce
art
that makes life so complicated, and
art
not as brilliant as it could be
due to
the lack of time and
art
supplies.
For instance
, Francis Bacon became a major
art
figure in the world during the 90s
as a result
of grants and scholarships given from the UK and Ireland, which allowed him to concentrate on his artworks and create masterpieces which became the world’s legacy. I believe that
this
school of thought is preferable because
art
investment is a
state
’s duty to the future generation. In conclusion,
although
spending money on other sections like the army and military could make some sense for a
state
union, there is a more sensible way to bring all of the people together all around the country through the national culture creation, it could be a more relevant and preferable expense of
state
budget.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay follows a clear logical structure, introducing each point distinctly and connecting them coherently.
task achievement
You should rework the introduction to more directly address both views and provide a clearer thesis statement.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your essay.
task achievement
Strive to discuss both views impartially and in equal measure before providing your own opinion.
task achievement
Include more detailed and varied examples to support your points to add depth to your argument and clarity to your examples.
coherence cohesion
Try to balance the main body paragraphs in length and development to ensure equal consideration of the views.
task achievement
Your conclusion should summarise the key points of both views and clearly restate your own opinion.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • promote
  • culture
  • creativity
  • economic growth
  • tourism
  • social development
  • personal development
  • merit
  • financial support
  • balanced
  • transparent
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