In the future, we will have more and more leisure time as machines replace many of the tasks we do at home and work. Discuss the benefits this will bring and also the problem it will cause.
Is it true that AI can fully replace manpower with
machines
in the future? Many a man reckon that they will for sure have maximum free time by following robotics in their personal and professional work. This
trend has certain benefits regarding efficiency but it can cause serious medical problems which are explained in the following paragraphs.
To begin
with, machines
are not known as the development with the maximum efficiency and accuracy for no reason. Simply put, the task accomplished with the help of mechanical equipment tends to be completed early with a higher rate of correctness as compared to manually done. To be more specific, it not only requires less physical effort but also
provides the desired output in a short period. To exemplify, no sooner did Japan replace manpower with automated machines
their productivity enhanced by 30% in 2020. Therefore
, machines
can complete work in less time with double output and individuals have maximum free time.
On the other hand
, the predominant problem that arises due to
machines
is the accidents and mishappening at the workplace and homes. It has been noticed that machine operators often meet with accidents while
operating big machines
and they can lose their limbs and sometimes their life also
. Undoubtedly, this
problem is very common in industries nowadays. For Instance
, TATA Steels was accused in 2016 of the sad demise of 13 workers who died by accident at the workplace. Hence
, This
automation system is equally against humans as much as it is in favor
.
Change the spelling
favour
To conclude
, without any doubt, it can be asserted that machines
tend to finish the task fast but the life-losing challenges they give are certainly against mankind. If any agency implements this
robotics model then
they must provide training to operate these types of equipment.Submitted by knavdeep3011 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Be sure to fully address all parts of the task. The essay was expected to discuss the benefits and problems of increased leisure time due to machines replacing human tasks, but the focus was on efficiency and workplace accidents, only indirectly relating to leisure time.
task achievement
Work on developing paragraphs with clear main ideas supported by specific examples. The connection between machines, efficiency, and leisure time could be clearer.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that the subsequent sentences develop that main idea directly.
task achievement
Avoid overgeneralizing or making sweeping statements without providing clear, relevant examples that are directly tied to the topic of leisure time.
task achievement
The examples provided should be directly relevant to the discussion of leisure time and not just to the use of machines in general.
coherence cohesion
Work on connecting ideas and paragraphs more effectively so that the essay has a clear and logical flow.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion should clearly present the main topic and summarize the key points made within the body paragraphs, respectively.
coherence cohesion
Utilize a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas within and across sentences and paragraphs.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!