We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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There are people with many problems all around the world. I absolutely agree with it, we should help them even if they are not part of our country or community for the following reasons if we do not help them, nobody is going to and in the future, it could be us who are in their situation. On our planet, there are so many different societies with disparate situations. In some parts of Africa, living conditions are deplorable. They do not have the same opportunities of getting food as our society and it continues to happen nowadays even if it is not as important as in the past.

Consequently

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, we should help them with all we can because they are not able to overcome their situation without our contribution.

For example

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, a prestigious sociologist called Isaac Barbadillo, states that 85% of people in poverty need the cooperation of other nations. Since time immemorial, the poor population have almost always been in similar places

such

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as Africa, parts of South America or Asia. We are used to it always being

this

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way,

nevertheless

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, in the future, it could be our society

that is

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in extreme poverty and we would like to have cooperation from other countries in the world.

For instance

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, a German economist called Manuel Neuer, affirms that in 2100, Africa and Asia will be the great world powers and Europe and America will be behind these two.

To conclude

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, I could not agree more with the idea of helping other countries or communities because it is our obligation and it could be us who need help

santos_dijFri Dec 08 2023

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task achievement

Expand your introduction to clearly outline your position and the reasons that will be discussed in the essay.

coherence and cohesion

To improve logical structure, consider breaking the essay into clearly defined paragraphs: one for your main argument, one for supporting evidence, and one for the implications of not helping others.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to provide a clear link between your arguments and your conclusion to reinforce your overall stance.

task achievement

You express a strong viewpoint on the importance of global assistance, demonstrating engagement with the topic.

task achievement

Your use of examples from credible sources adds weight to your argument and shows an understanding of the topic.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

267 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

global interconnectivity
international cooperation
ethics
moral obligation
geographical borders
diplomatic relations
economic stability
global security
resource allocation
expertise
international aid
dependency and development
sustainable solutions
local and global initiatives
community resilience

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We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

some people believe the government should spend money building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others however think that building more and wider roads is a better way to reduce the traffic congestion. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries, many children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people say it is the responsibility of governments to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?